Friday, May 18, 2012
Mom keeps having the same occurring dream. She said she dreamt about forgetting to feed her baby - "a baby", but not sure if it was hers. She has this dream often. "I keep forgetting to feed the baby in my dream! I'm running around doing all these things and stop right in my tracks and say, 'Oh no! The baby!'" She also dreams that she forgets to feed her dog. I went online and Googled it. I found a website that stated that if a person dreams about forgetting to feed a baby, it's symbolic for that person (in real life) is forgetting to nurture themselves. They're running around taking care of everybody else, but they don't take care of themselves, feed themselves, remembering that in order to take care of somebody else, they must take care of themselves. I have to keep an eye on mom because there are some days she goes without eating. She says she forgets, or that she's just not hungry, yet she'll nosh on potato chips if they're lying around. She hasn't really been out to dinner or lunch in a very long time, unless my dad is staying in the hospital and we are able to take her to a Friday's nearby. The main problem here is that she hasn't used hospice to the fullest extent as she should. She's always been a bit uptight about strange people in her house. She doesn't like the feeling of having anyone in her home without her being there. I remember when I used to get a cleaning woman with her husband to stop by my mom's house every week. She always said, "You're gonna be here right?" And, I had to be there until they were gone. So, having hospice there - people who are helping my dad is seen as an "intrusion" and I don't know how to convince her that they are there to help - not to rob us. She has in her mind that anyone who does any service inside the home (even chimney sweepers, maintenance people) will try to hurt elderly people or take advantage of them. While this may be true in some cases, she has taken this to an extreme phobia that is taking her quality of life away.
There are no easy solutions, suggestions or ideas that can be given to Mom right now. She's watching her best friend, her husband, her companion for over 50 years and the strongest & toughest man she's ever met, become the weakest person she has ever seen. And although I'm his daughter and love my dad, I can't imagine what she's going through emotionally. My fear is that her emotional well-being will trickle into her physical well-being if she doesn't start looking out for herself, or at least accepting the help that she's offered from both the immediate family and hospice. Please keep my parents in your prayers if you can.
"Don't count the days, make the days count." ~Muhammad Ali
For more of Deb's articles, please visit: www.debrapasquella.com
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