Living Proof

Karma hit me. I’m sick. I’m coughing, sneezing, sniffling, hacking and whining like a little crybaby. My mom says my apartment is too clean – I disinfect way too much, leaving my immune system vulnerable to evil rotten germs. “Why ya gotta clean so much? You’re making your immune system weak!” That’s her theory. Try having OCD and hearing those words. I cringe. Antibacterial gels are in each room, just in case you need an extra squirt or two or three or four… I go above and beyond the call of my sanitary duties. At night, the sink has to not only be disinfected and “dry” – it also has to have a fresh wedge of lemon in the drain to kill any remaining germs leftover from whatever. It’s my deranged way of defining health. My mom called me this morning and asked me how I was feeling. I tried hinting to her that I needed her delicious miraculous chicken soup cure, but she didn’t pick up on it. When I decided to bluntly indicate that her chicken soup heals me, she went into defense mode an...

Genuineness. Do many people posses it? I guess it depends on the topic or situation. But think about it – genuineness – that act of truly caring without any motives or agendas. What does this person(s) have to gain by helping you? I’m certainly not trying to make anyone distrust people, however, I always like knowing the motives of those who help. They say that if you don’t allow yourself to trust others, then it’s most likely that you’re the one that can’t be trusted. It kind of makes sense though. They also say if your lover constantly accuses you of cheating, then they must be cheating on you. (Unless there’s good reason to believe they’re cheating of course…) I’m assuming some heavy thinking, espresso-drinking psychiatrist came up with these theories. Then again, it could have been some crazy Christian lesbian writer who overanalyzes things way too much… Genuineness. My friend is sick. I don’t want her to be alone while she’s coughing, hacking, sneezing, honking...