Living Proof

Lately, I've been getting random anonymous comments on a blog post entitled, " Is Homosexuality a Perversion ". It happens late at night where I get a notification of someone leaving a comment on my blog. I have a tracker that tells me where they found my website. This person in particular Googled "is homosexuality a perversion" and found my site. It's the same person because they are all from the same town in Missouri. Anonymous writes: "You can't reconcile a Christian lifestyle and a homosexual one. Homosexuals choose to practice perversion. The confusion lies in the distinction between a good friend with whom you have an emotional bond and someone you have sex with. People are confused and perverted. I know that a lot of people accept this lifestyle in this day and age, but that does not make it right. The vast majority of Germans agreed with Adolf Hitler in the 30s, and we all know how that ended up. I'm not comparing homosexuality to H...

For the longest time I have hesitated to attend any type of church services. I’ve always said, “My relationship is with God and I can pray anywhere” - and I still stand by that statement, however lately I feel more of a pull - more of a need to be around more Christians, even if they disagree with my lifestyle. For one, I don’t have to say a word. I prefer Assembly of God churches, so it can be difficult for someone of the LGBT community to be “accepted” or taken seriously as a Christian. I have had so many positive experiences attending these types of churches, which makes me want to go back. What makes anyone think that their life is “cleaner” than my own? We’re all messy - we have our own little issues to deal with, but isn’t that how God made us? Or is it an intentional evil choice to be sinful? That depends I guess. What makes a divorcee with her ex-spouse still living, less sinful than the happily married homosexual sitting next to her? What makes a perceptual liar any less sin...

More often than not, many of my readers saw the bitterness and rage that went into religion, mostly due to the many Christian debates regarding homosexuality vs. religion. Some would email me on the side or make public comments asking me “why” I would defend myself against people who were so very hateful and had words to only tear down somebody’s spirit, not to edify or encourage them as true Christians would. They would call it “righteous judgment” and explain that since I was living such a sinful life by having a loving partner of many years, that I was going straight to hell and that I should give up this “filthy lifestyle” and repent. While focusing very closely on my life, I started to realize that it wasn’t me who was hurting and feeling all sorts of guilt and shame, but it was the very ones who attacked me so viciously. Even when they threw scriptures at me, I’d show them scriptures to counteract it. The Bible is very complex, misinterpreted and also, misunderstood most of the t...

Exactly one month today, I had written a post entitled, “ The Messy Christian ”. In short, it basically summed up my dislike for the people in the church who were so quick to judge, yet failed to look at the speck in their own eye. We’re there to pray to God, not to play God. Like I said in that post, I had grew apart from the church for a very long time and developed a much stronger relationship with God, however I was finding that lately, I feel more of a pull to go back. Each time I prepared to go, something made me think, “I can’t go back there.” I can definitely sit and ‘try’ to focus on what the speaker is saying, but what if the speaker is tearing down those who are homosexual? The last time I went to church, they had a service dedicated to gays and lesbians. In my head, I thought this was going to be a positive thing. ...It wasn’t. They basically tore us down. As the female minister described a scenario of sorts, I began to question my own self-worth. She said, “Remember when y...

From time to time, I’ll get an email from someone wanting to challenge me on religious views due to my homosexual lifestyle. They’ll ask the same thing every other Christian has asked me: “How can you be a lesbian and a Christian at the same time?” Once, I had sent someone a link to an article I had written so it would better explain that, but the person who emailed me pointed out how impersonal it was. Other mail comes from hateful Christians telling me that I'm going to hell and that I live a sinful life. I also have emails such as older women who have been married for over somewhat years, has kids, grandkids and their life has been made “comfortable”, ask me, “I always knew I was gay and can’t keep it in any longer. What should I do?” For me, I can’t answer that. The entire concept of possibly having your family, which you’ve created, you loved for all these years can come toppling down like an unstable building in an earthquake. I can’t say, “Come out and be YOU!” It’s not my p...

It's been a rough few days for me, but I'm back. Instead of writing a funny story or something that had transpired in my life---I am going to share with you an email I received from another blogger. She is Christian--but believes that all gay and lesbians are perverts. Maybe I can get your thoughts on this, regardless if you are in agreement or not. I like to get all different point of views. So please feel free to say what's on your mind and exactly how you feel about this topic. I welcome negative and positive feedback. "Hi Deb, You left a fairly lengthy comment on my blog back in March about homosexual statistics and for some reason blogger never notified me through email and I just stumbled across it the other day. Generally when someone takes so much time to leave a comment I like to respond, so my apologies for not getting back to you sooner. Thanks for taking the time to comment. In the future, feel free to send me an email directly if I don’t respond in ...