Living Proof

'Bout to have mah' baby, but first, lemme take a selfie! No doubt, the ability to take a selfie with the reverse cam option on your phone was such a great invention. Nobody has to take your picture for you. I love seeing people post up shots of themselves or post up a really cool seflie for a profile pic. That's great. But I have to say, there is one thing that makes me nervous: multiple selfies. I know what you're asking - why would that make me nervous? Because it's narcissistically psychotic. There is no other way to put it. You know through the 4, 5, 6, 7, 8 pics that they took of themselves in a row, there's about 298 more of the same shots. It's like throwing a bunch of proofs up on Facebook and asking your friends, "Which smile or duck face looks better on me?" Below are some shots some girls took while feeling 'pretty'. America's Got Talent - definitely. 2nd pic proves that duck face isn't an option for her. ...

Recently, a friend had written a post entitled, " A Twelve Step " which spoke about addictive friendships/relationships and I wanted to expand on it through my own experiences. Let's use some fun clichés first: "No two people are alike", "each person is like a snowflake, unique in their own way" - true true true, blah blah blah. But there is a common denominator among unhealthy relationships, and that being the addictive part. Like in an intimate relationship, the break up to make up scenario is one I think we all have been through. We hate em', we love em', then we hate em' again. It definitely takes two to mingle and two to really brawl. I am grateful that my wife is the polar opposite of me. She defuses when I'm up in arms. After seeing her calmness, that alone calms me. I'm learning through her how to be calm. It's really not in my nature, but I try. When you have two people who are friends or in a relationship, who ha...

Through years of being in and out of therapy and numerous psychologists, psychiatrists, LCWs, PhDs, MDs, XYZs - I have discovered something fascinating: the internet. It's no secret that I suffer from anxiety and panic disorder, and along with it comes that brutal wave of depression. But depression is not my root problem. Anxiety is my enemy. I've had it ever since I was 16 years old. I have PTSD . Plenty of doctors have tried throwing antidepressants to get rid of my…anxiety. Why are you giving me an anti DEPRESSANT for my anxiety? They said that anxiety and depression go hand-in-hand. The only thing these antidepressants did for me was give me more anxiety by creating that little 'boost' when you're are in a funk. I have coffee for that. There are too many unqualified "doctors" bringing in suffering patients for only 15 minutes, giving them a diagnosis and a script to boot. That's not enough. Big pharma gives these doctors kickbacks and usually, ...

There's never a dull moment and yet, there seems to be a bit of comic relief when it comes to anything in life with my mom and myself. Unfortunately, she ran into medical fiascos which left her getting a blood transfusion due to a cancerous tumor sucking the life-force right out of her. So, we sent her up to get the good ol' colonoscopy, which left her later that evening schlepping up to the ER due to a sepsis infection. Well, that left her in the hospital for the rest of the week - and what a week that was. Let me backtrack a bit and just say this: I asked her while the EMT crew was carrying her away, "Mom, which hospital do you want to go to?" "Do I have a choice?" "Yes. Your doctors can go to either one." So she picked the ricketiest, oldest, almost abandoned looking hospital there is around. For the love of God, there's moss and vines growing all over the outside of the building, quite similar to The Munsters' house. "I...

The definition of bigot is: "a person who is utterly intolerant of any differing creed, belief, or opinion." So I am absolutely correct in using the word "bigotry" for W.W. Bridal Boutique. Think about it: if I walked into a Macy's and asked one of their representatives if they could help me and my partner find dresses for our wedding, what would happen if they refused us just because we're lesbians? What if we walked into a bakery and asked if they could make us a cake for our wedding and they said no due to our lifestyle? "Freedom of religion" is being abused and demonstrated as an excuse to discriminate against same sex couples. When I heard about W. W. Bridal Boutique discriminating against a lesbian couple who only wanted to purchase a dress, I felt complete sadness. On their Facebook review section , I gave them a 1 star with a few words: "★☆☆☆☆ Too many people like to play God. Remember 50+ years ago when it was illegal for interr...

"Why are you stifling your cries? Crying is supposed to be somewhat of a loud event." Jeffrey looked at me puzzled, as I sat across from him not crying hard enough. In the past 12 years I've been going to him for counseling, he has never once seen me cry before. To me, I was having a full-fledged meltdown. To him? I was just sniffling over something trivial, like watching the ending of Titanic. "Louder?" I asked. "Yes. You're holding back. Let it out." I sniffled some more, wiped my nose and then said, "I don't know how."  I spoke about this 5 years ago on this previous article and it mentions more about how Mom always told me, "Don't cry, mama - don't cry." I told Jeffrey about it and how my father did the same thing. They both wanted to see all of their kids happy. Crying meant that they were 100% unhappy with everything. So, even if you were crying over a heartbreak, it meant somehow, you weren't happy...

About once a week, I put on my Joel Osteen app and listen to his message while cleaning up or when I'm doing laundry. He's great. He always starts with a silly joke and has a bunch of crazy stories that he pulls right out of his hat in every sermon. He's very entertaining - almost like a motivational speaker. He'll entitle one of his sermons and just run with it. Like for instance, the other day he had one that was called, "You're Coming Out". And no - no reference to dem' closet gays. He focuses on positive affirmations and defying any bad news or money problems. "You're coming out of that debt!"  "You're coming out of that addiction!" "You're coming out of that sickness!"  "You're coming out of that depression!"  Then I noticed a theme with every single sermon: repetitive false hope. I don't want to be a "Debbie Downer", but I will say that some things have to happen...