Living Proof

Lately, I've been reading a lot of books regarding spirituality, near-death experiences and overall ways to cope with the mind's inability to shut the hell up. One of the books that I particularly enjoyed was called, The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle. I know, I know, I'm like a decade late on this best seller, but I feared it may have other belief systems that went against mine. I'm more open to other belief systems today, but surprisingly, they referenced a lot about Jesus in this book. The main gist is to separate yourself from your physical mind and become your "Being" -- your "soul" and observe what the mind does to you or what it conjures up. And once you witness and notice the thoughts, all thoughts seem to dissolve, as if you caught your own mind undressing. That's the best way I can describe it, because this book can be very 'wordy', the the point of dropping it and picking up The Cat in the Hat instead. I guess it's very ...

Sometimes it's hard to just keep it together and not run outside screaming bloody murder just to get it all out. It's expected, and yet 'uncivilized'. So, we keep it under wraps. Have you ever felt like if one tiny change disrupts your life, it's the be-all end-all? When all of it finally passes, maybe weeks, months and even years later, the inner chaos withers away miraculously. I heard a phrase used by Joyce Meyer. She said, "I may not be where I want to be, but thank God I'm not where I used to be." And if you truly meditate on that one phrase, it kind of hits you like, "Wow, I made it through all that," whereas before, you thought you'd never. And of course the old saying, "If God takes you to it, He'll get you through it." I do believe that. It's easier to believe something like that before a stressful event and months after it. Strange how life works. It's hard to stay calm in the midst of chaos - to have inn...

For most of my life I thought my entire being was meaningless. I had no ‘part’ in life – no role to play. I grew up the youngest out of four siblings. I was the baby of the family. They even called me ‘the baby’ until I was about to reach ten years old. During my teen years, I still was treated much like ‘the baby’ of the family. I was always protected and guarded. My mother never wanted me to leave the house or go out with my friends. I’m thirty-three now (or as I tell everyone- 29) she still doesn’t want me to travel or go far distances due to the evil world out there. She’s nervous something will happen to me. The constant fear she holds in her heart regarding my whereabouts sometimes drives me crazy, but other times I’m very grateful that someone loves me that much. Back to thinking my life was meaningless. I had to direction. I had no guidance or advice, other than, “Stay home Deb,” or “Don’t travel so far away Deb,” and “It’s snowing, stay home instead.” I was ‘safer’ in my mo...