Living Proof

What happens when everything you knew comes crashing down as one big, elaborate facade? It's like your mind completely stops -- relinquishing all thoughts, dreams and hopes of a future once planned out so thoroughly and so carefully. It can be anything sudden, like a death of a loved one or finding out that the one person you were about to marry has decided not to go through with it. Maybe you were served divorce papers. Whatever the situation is, it's all relative. They all just seem to smack you with a dose of reality that there is nothing can be untouchable. Our future is not secure. Our future is actually an illusion if you want to even take it a step further. Nothing is set in stone -- ever. Maybe that's why we get so disappointed in certain situations. I mean, I always thought my dad would live forever and that my mom would never get cancer. I just 'thought'. I also thought my life would turn out differently, at least to the point of having a general idea of...

There's no rhyme or reason to any relationship. Each union has its own characteristics that make it unique. Dare I even compare them to snowflakes, but I won't. In my honest opinion, I've always felt you should choose your partner very carefully. Choose someone who will make you laugh, make you think, make you FEEL.  Choose someone who you can talk to as if they were your best friend -- because they should be your best friend. Choose someone who doesn't mind the silence in between and the chaos that strikes unexpectedly because one day when you're old and gray and no longer possess any sexual desire whatsoever, you're gonna want someone to back up the goods. Sex should be the bonus of a relationship -- not the main course. If you have both, kudos to you. You want someone that can make you laugh, someone who can hold a conversation and keep your interest. It's not going to be perfect -- no one's is. Every relationship has its storms, it's up to...

It's a gloomy Sunday afternoon and I'm stuck home because I decided to do a "cleanse" yesterday morning that should have lasted approximately 5-8 hours. Unfortunately, that's still not the case. You can slap a big "TMI" over this post, but it is what it is. Needless to say, I've been online a lot. I mean, more than I have ever been online -- between Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, whatever-gram -- it's been interesting. We put a lot out there, don't we? From our obsessions with independent films to our fixations on borderline racially motivated politics -- we kinda' get the gist of what makes our friends and acquaintances 'tick'. And you certainly get your share of reading about my twisted life and views, as well as an overabundance of Lola. And now, you get to learn about my clogged up pipes, which is why I'm writing on a Sunday afternoon. I shouldn't be sitting in my office right now. I was supposed to pick up a new fauc...

If I had to say one thing about my friends, I would definitely consider them to be my chosen family. When I bring someone into my life -- or better yet -- when someone chooses to spend their time with me, I never take it for granted. Just like a relationship, I always try to seek out a lifetime friend. Of course you're either going to get 'for a reason, a season or a lifetime' -- and that's okay. People that come into our lives are meant to either teach us a lesson, to help us in times of trouble or to simply make you laugh and smile for however long. And as we grow older, that whole "BFF" thing sort of takes a left turn to Albuquerque. It's okay to have that once a month friend (and no I'm not referring to Flo), and it's okay to pick up where you left off after 6 months of not seeing one another. I have friends that I haven't seen in almost a year, where I can talk to them this very minute and it feels like just yesterday. That's what I...

Ever notice when you talk to someone in a relationship or even someone who has gone through a recent breakup, the person usually will tell you that they are the "better half"? In a sense that says, "Well, I do everything right, while they always screw everything up," and those who've gone through a breakup will usually call their exes, "the evil ex". Nobody's ever "wrong" - because let's face it, they are the most angelic, generous, thoughtful partner anyone could ever have. We never want to be seen as the "mean partner" or the "evil ex" - it's either egotistical or just human nature, or are they both correlated? I don't know. Don't get me wrong, there are conscious and honest people out there who will say, "Oh man, I'm a huge pain in the ass," without thinking twice about it, but the majority will tell you, "I am innocent. Period." Truth is? Nobody's "innocent...

She gets the tinfoil hat of shame. Without a rebuttal from my better half, because (fortunately), she doesn't have access to blogs or social media at work, I am pleased forced to post a part II on her. Yesterday, as I was reading a fellow blogger named Katy go on about her grandmother and how she feels the government is out to get her, I shared my story telling her about Madelene and how paranoid she is - conspiracy-theory-paranoid about the government. I'll start with the other night while I was preparing dinner. I was washing something in the sink. We have this huge window overlooking the wooded area outside, and now that it gets dark around 4:30, it was pitch black. I turned the shade down and said, "Ugh, feels like I'm being watched for some reason," in reference of not being able to see outside. I always get that feeling if I can't see beyond a certain distance. Mad quickly turns around and says, "You are." All you hear is a "ka-pla...

Have you ever had an argument with your other half and it just carries on and on, into a path of that dreaded awkward silence? After having a little spat with the wife, I sat at my desk with my coffee, staring out at the rain and began to think about my past and how unstable it used to be. I used to have that with my ex-girlfriends. The arguments seemed to have lasted forever. Between stubbornness, pride, ego - whatever the reason - it just wouldn't let up. And it's especially challenging when both people have huge egos to boot. But the one thing I most admire about my wife is that she has a short memory. I don't mean that in a bad way either. (She's probably plotting my murder after that sentence.) I mean, when we have a heated argument and things are just crazy, an hour later, she'll be like, "Honey, wanna go to the store with me?" --As if nothing took place. It's not that she "forgot" about it -- it's more about forgiveness. I admit,...