Living Proof

I'd like to think that I give people the benefit of the doubt when it comes to human nature type of b.s. in life, but sometimes it's frustrating when you get hit with a brick again and again and again . I 'get' human psychology and the way most minds work: when frustrated about yourself, you may try and drag someone else's self-esteem down with you. Usually, if someone is very insecure about themselves, whether all the time, or even just once in a while, this kinda of crap happens. I'm guilty of it too, where I'm a moody bitch just because I don't feel good about myself. It happens. But when does it come to the point where your self-esteem is so low, that you actually feel better by insulting another person for whatever reason? And the passive aggressive ones are the worst because they can always backtrack their blows by saying, "Oh, you just took it the wrong way…" Did I? The worst is when someone tries to "insinuate" somethin...

We're so complicated, aren't we? We're complex in ways that make us so unique - the way we handle life's curveballs and the way we respond to people who have possibly hurt us. And maybe there are people out there who aren't so complicated. I have met people who were over-the-top forgiving and I have also met those who were very unforgiving, bitter and resentful for whatever they've endured. I have seen people with huge egos, to where they couldn't possibly apologize, and I have seen those with humble and sincere hearts, who were too eager to say, "Hey, I"m sorry. Please forgive me." I'm not sure if it's in our genetics or if it's just our ever-developing characters (because we're always growing and learning at any age), but it makes me wonder why some people are so angry at the world. Don't get me wrong - I have had my bad days where I just wanted to give up and say, 'eff you' to the world, but I quickly come back...

You could have everything in the world you can possibly want: a nice car, good looks, wealth, education and anything else you would desire. The one thing it doesn't guarantee is happiness, contentment, a healthy mind…peace. Sometimes I wonder about some people I come across who seemingly "have it all" - but then think, just by their attitude toward life and people in general, they're not at peace at all. When I look at the videos of Elliot Rodger, here you see this handsome young man, going to college, has a gorgeous BMW and somehow, somewhere, something's lacking. You can hear it - you can feel it - you can sense that something is a bit 'off'. When I first saw his face, I said, "He killed all those kids?" He's gorgeous and probably comes from a well-to-do family. But why would this guy have any problems with girls? Why would girls reject this gorgeous kid? Didn't he have it all? And then I listened. I observed. He's 'off...

Throughout the years, people come in and out of our lives - like the saying,  for a reason, a season or for a lifetime.  There are people that come into our lives who teach us something valuable that we'll need for our future. There are people who just stumble across our path when we're going through a hard time, and without them, we wouldn't have probably made it out of that storm. But then there are those types of people who are with us every step of the way. Even those people sometimes leave us unexpectedly, sadly as that sounds. It's no wonder that the majority of us, and I'm using that term loosely, feels abandoned. There's this sense of looming abandonment that we all have because let's face it - we've all lost someone we have loved through a breakup or even through death. Both are very similar, except when someone leaves you and is still alive, then that's a conscious choice for whatever reason. I'm not sure which one is more hurtful to ...

Sometimes life has its challenging twists and turns, even if it's just emotionally 'twisted'. There are so many unanswered questions floating in and out of my mind, and sometimes, I'm not even sure if I really want those questions answered in some cases. Nonetheless, it still looms over me like a dark cloud. During my entire lifetime, I may have lost a bit less than a handful of people, three who were very close to my heart, especially my father. I think it's safe to say that when you lose someone you love, it's totally okay to ask questions and wonder where they are, or if there is a place in the afterlife. Even when you have faith in whatever religion you believe in, it can really challenge your belief system and make you wonder, "Is there really an afterlife? Are they safe? Will they be okay?" You love the person so much that you wish you could know for sure that they're doing alright and perhaps, they're not suffering any longer. Life...

Straight from the agonizing breech birth that you endured with me, you and I are not supposed to be here right now. But here we are, best friends, still enjoying life together and always there for one another for anything. Thank you for choosing to have me. After 7 years of having 3 girls, you could have just "deleted" me. You didn't. You could have had your life back, without another kid latching onto your apron strings. You chose to keep me, even when I was a bit of an 'oops'. Thank you. Between scrapes and bruises to slicing raw potato slices for my puffy-cried-out eyes, all because someone broke my heart, you always healed me and bandaged me up. Thank you. Between teaching me how to ice-skate on the pond, and afterwards taking me out to that Polynesian restaurant chatting over a pu pu platter, I leaned in and told you, "Mom, this is the best day of my life!" -Thank you. Between endless after school activities and religion classes, to trudging a...

I always have these little things that I do that people are always like, "I never knew that!" And usually, it really works. So I decided to do a fun little post about my little habits and what works for me health-wise and spiritually as well. Hope this helps you too! You may have already heard of some of these, but I live by these religiously. Sprinkle some cinnamon in your coffee. It's not only delicious, but it lowers your blood sugar. When ordering a new drink at the bar, ask the bartender to put it in the same glass. Your ice is officially seasoned and will taste much better. (Bartending experience.)  Render bacon fat and always use it when frying eggs. burger or steak in the pan. Trust me.  Include avocados when eating eggs of any style -- it will fill you up until later afternoon or even dinner.  For a hangover, especially for an upset stomach, take a probiotic with 2 billion active cultures.  Add 2-3 drops of vodka in your ear if you have a wax build...

Making minimum wage with my crazy family. Back when I was in middle school, I remember my friend Beth telling me about this Chinese takeout joint that was hiring anyone off the books. I had no idea what "off the books" even meant, until she explained it was just straight up cash. I didn't even have working papers. I made $4 bucks an hour and only worked on the weekends. Back then, minimum wage was $3.75, so I was really happy about the offer. I'd come home with extra cash so I could spend it at the bowling alley or skating rink. I was a happy camper. After high school, I started working for a pizza joint as the delivery girl. I worked my ass off. I was there for 12 hours per day, from 10am to 10pm 7 days a week. I didn't mind it because it was like my home away from home. I was working for a friend of mine. I racked in well over $50 bucks in tips from one night and didn't even make over $2 bucks an hour. Then my father dragged me into his fish market and r...

For the most part, people just don't care. And what I mean by that is, that frivolous blabber people do that seems to be absolutely pointless and well, boring. There's two types of people: the blabbermouth that never stops talking about "nothing" - perhaps nervous chatter, and then you have the blabbermouth who talks about morbidly fascinating 'taboo' type of things, which can be kinda' interesting. But when you're super exhausted and just wanting the bare minimum, both can be frustrating to experience. A little secret about my wife: whenever she is entirely bored with a one way conversation, her eyebrows immediately rise to the ceiling. She hates when I reveal that little factoid about her. Psychoanalyzing. It can definitely be a fun event, especially when you're eavesdropping, and especially if it's in a bar. And remember, (from my own experience) - bartenders can hear a pin drop from a mile away. You think that you're 'far ...