Living Proof

I gave Madelene a blanket and pillow and threw her on the couch last night. I didn't want her to go through a night of horrific blood curdling screams from all the pain I'm experiencing, especially that I can no longer take pain meds. I would have taken the couch myself, but I lock up every time I lay down on it.  She's been having a rough go of it at work and super stressed out, so she needed her sleep more than I did at this point. Why torture her by letting her sleep in the same bed with me? My dog had no problem taking up the rest of the unused portion of the bed. With each scream of pain, Lola looked up at me, sniffed my face and then gave me a lick. It was like I had a K9 nurse taking care of me, well, a very short legged, long-bodied one with chronic halitosis, but nonetheless. I woke up this morning, enjoyed a cup of coffee out on the deck and finally had some relief from the night's agonizing pain. I went to physical therapy last night and it helped a lot, bu...

Even Lola's tired of taking care of me. If there's one person I would never, ever live with, it would be...me. Well, maybe half of who I am, because I am a helluva' cook and I'm very nurturing, but the other half is one. pain. in. the. ass. Half the time, I'm up with insomnia or just in excruciating pain. As you know, I'm no stranger to doctors' offices, emergency rooms and hospitals. I'm one hot mess lately. Usually it requires some sort of assistance, like helping me out to the car to rush off to the ER or helping me even make it to the loo. Those are the extreme days. But, we married in health and in sickness. Somewhere right now, my wife is twitching. But I'm not so bad. I make Madelene laugh, I'm silly and immature as hell. I think that's what saves our relationship: laughter. Or maybe it's the dog. In any case, it's the little things in life that bring us joy. God, now I'm starting to sound like a Hallmark card. My point...

The theme of this month has been brought to you by PAIN. And with its unknown or 'guessed' diagnosis', I'm officially calling it bullshit. Lower back pain. Keepin' it simple. It's slowly fading off into a tolerable type of pain, but nonetheless. The only thing that makes me tolerable, is the good ol' herb I've been counting on for when the ibuprofen doesn't quite cut it. This is my nightstand. It holds two or three essential needs for my evening and morning 'lockups'. I think it should be prescribed as an antidepressant, pain reliever, and medication for sleeping disorders. Maybe it already has in other states.   In other news, I have a lot of work to do on my cooking blog, trying to reduce inflammation and pain (as well as trying to lose weight) with the Paleo diet. I was unable to maintain the diet while I was plastered to my bed with a locked up back, but I'm back baby. I've been buying grass fed USDA organic beef and making thes...

My work station today. It looks like I can't "wine" anymore since Facebook rejected one of my posts that included the "promotion" of alcohol due to a photo of a glass of wine. They said that it would encourage kids under the age of eighteen to drink. Isn't there a rule that sets the age limit for eighteen and over on Facebook? And why would one of my posts send some teenage kid on a drinking binge? Eh well, I guess I'm just a bad example. So yesterday I decided to take a ride with Madelene to bring Lola to the vet for her booster shots. I hobbled around a bit, but did quite well. As soon as we were done with dinner later that evening, my back locked up again while I was sitting down on the recliner. I could not get up and even when Mad helped me, it felt like she was removing my entire spinal cord out. It's been almost two weeks and I feel like I'm starting to lose my mind. I can't do anything. I still can't make the bed. (Mad! Please...

Sometimes you never truly know what measures you'll go to until you have severe chronic pain that lasts for over a week or more. I'm only on week two with excruciating back pain and I. have. had. it. I had two good days, meaning, I could walk around and make a drink. That's it. I forget about all the "abilities" I have, now focusing in on all my "disabilities" that I've come across. The rheumatologist wanted to give me a prescription strength of Aleve, because he said that the Toradol and Advil I was taking could possibly give me a heart attack. Great. I spent hours Googling that one. I just thought stomach upset and that was that. Another 'fear' to jot down on my list. Then I found out the prescription he gave me was even more harmful to my heart. So now, I'm freaking out over the heart attack meds, and wanted something a bit more natural. I was reintroduced with 'medicinal' cannabis. Back then it was more recreational - well, ...

As I sit here and type, every joint in my fingers, hands, arms are going 'clickity-click-click'. I've been having joint pain really bad lately. It then progressed into my elbows, spine, legs, knees, ankles, toes - you get my drift. I found myself literally stuck in my bed screaming for help one morning. But let me just backtrack to last Friday. My sister came over with her two adorable dogs, which Lola goes nuts for. They're now a little 'pack'. My sis (being the little athlete she is) runs all three dogs up our incredibly hilly driveway and into the woods. Lola. loves. it. Anytime I say, "Is Aunt Carla coming over?" She'll immediately jump up and look for her out on the deck. As we were watching the dogs play together, we decided to take the little party over back to my sister's house. After a few cocktails, I found myself having the guts to walk the trails with my sister and the three dogs. Not only did I overexert myself because I haven...