Living Proof

For a very long time, I played “the little victim cry baby” and complained about who did what and he said she said bullshit. And because I chose to “let” it affect me, it also affected a great deal on my overall health and well-being. It’s hard to turn your back on someone who is literally insulting you, bashing you or betraying you in some shape or form. The crazy thing about it is, the more you respond to it, the more it will increase. And I know most will say, “Well I had to defend myself” - and we all want to defend ourselves for reasons of “self-respect” - but in the process, are we actually hurting ourselves in the long run? Is it better to walk away from an abusive person (verbally speaking) or to stay and defend yourself - fight it out till someone wins? There are so many different opinions on this. I speak mostly about trivial gossip, rumors, people who just want to annoy you for a living. I literally had someone verbally bashing me day in and day out, and I felt this consta...

Everything I do, everything I have done, including everything I plan on doing, has one underlining motivational factor: Madelene. Whether or not other people view us as a "family unit", that’s exactly what we are, even without having children. She’s my family. She’s my wife, my best friend and the person I trust 110%. I seriously don’t have fun when I’m not with her. It’s not that I need her to be with me 24/7, but it feels like there’s something missing. If I’m out with friends and I order a delicious martini, I think, “Oh Mad would love this” , or if I order something I think she’d like, I’d save half and bring it home for her. It’s just not the same without her. We had gotten into an argument not too long ago -mind you we hardly ever argue, but a disagreement once in a while is healthy. This one was one of our biggies. She said to me, “Do you want me to move out so you can think clearly?” I stared at her thinking, “Oh my God, I couldn’t stay here if you left!” The thou...

The basic lessons in life when you’re a child are all about social skills: saying please and thank you and being polite to those around you. Learning the golden rule of life deemed important and “sticks and stones” were embedded into our brain so we wouldn’t get offended so easily. We were taught to protect ourselves with the “sticks and stones” quote, by those who would hurt us with mere words. Did we ever really learn? What about “two wrongs don’t make a right”? It seemed to have lost its importance as years went by. So, when someone bad mouthed you, it was because they were hurt by what you did, therefore hurting you back twice as badly. Especially in matters of the heart and relationships, all of these great rules to live by have simply trickled down the drain. Nobody likes getting hurt. And, as hard as this may be to swallow: nobody enjoys hurting others - even if it seems as though they do. I guess this is what I believe anyway. We try to give the benefit of the doubt. If y...