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7 Ways to Escape Your Own Mental Prison

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Have you ever lost your zeal for life---you lost interest in the things you used to love to do? Your passions, hobbies and whatever it was that made you feel alive was no longer a priority---just a stagnant feeling of loss of one's self. Things like grief and depression of any sort can tear away our will to keep doing our best. It happened to me when I lost my parents. I lost my laugh, I lost my desire to write music, play guitar, and I even lost some friends along the way due to my disinterest in life. They had nothing in common with me anymore. I remember a friend wanted to take me to this beautiful resort in Mexico to go parasailing and relax in our own private pool. My heart said yes, but my spirit was too numb to even catch on how emotionally and spiritually healing this would've been for me. I stopped having parties, I stopped visiting my friends...I stopped socializing as I once used to. So here's my list of how I became free from my own mental prison: Put Down The S

4 Ways to Ease the Stressors in Life

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Most of us are afraid of letting go of the things we love, whether it's a person, place, past experience, grief and even the illusion of having some type of control. There's a twisted psychological truth in that some of us actually accept or even "enjoy" the feeling of negative emotions. This is why when some people are sad or crying, they'd most likely listen to sad songs. It amplifies the emotion, making them feel validated. "Wow, someone else relates!" People want to be understood and have others empathize with them, even if it's through literature or music. They refuse to get it through real in person encounters. It can make them feel "weak," when actually, vulnerability is the strongest element in a person. Not many are able to become vulnerable. But then again, why trust other people with your business? I occasionally blast it out publicly, to let you know that you're not alone. Personally speaking, I've suffered with anxiety

Pray for Your "Enemies"

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The way you treat others says a lot about what kind of person you are. The way you talk about others says a lot about you as well. It also shows that part of you that lacks love and needs healing. When someone is speaking badly about someone else's appearance, I look at that person (even if they are beautiful on the outside) and see nothing but the ugliness on the inside. It's a huge indication their own self-image isn't the best. Even when I'm having a bad day with my own self-image---because let's face it, we all get insecure from time to time---how is downing another person's outward appearance going to make you feel or look any better? No matter who you're talking to, that person is already judging your character. Watch your opinions, especially around people you respect. Hurt People Hurt People Treating people poorly also can show how hurt you've been in the past. Hurt people hurt people. If you have a reputation of being mean, unfair, extremely con

4 Ways to Cope With a Breakup or Separation In a Healthy Way

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Many people underestimate the grief associated with a divorce or a breakup. This can even be with severed ties with a good friend. Everyone's different, and everyone grieves differently. But the power of a separation can truly destroy a person. Also, a separation can either make or break the relationship. So when your mind is set on, "He/she will never call me," ---don't bank on that. The void of your absence will either show one or two things: how much they missed and loved you, or how okay they are without you. That doesn't mean they don't love you---they probably still do. Sometimes a circumstantial situation can create a lack in contact. For instance, personally speaking, I've always told my spouse 30 years ago, I would never marry a cop or soldier. I respect them and thank them for their service, but I don't want to see two officers come walking up to my door and tell me the worst news imaginable, nor do I want to bite my nails off every time I se

4 Ways To Forgive the "Unforgivable"

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Sometimes, people can really disappoint us. Maybe you found yourself in an argument that burned out of control like a wildfire, where there seemed to be no hope for forgiveness nor reconciliation. Words are powerful and usually unforgettable. You start reading or watching videos about "toxic people" or "narcissism"---but be careful how you diagnose someone, because it may have been a knee-jerk reaction toward a previous action. Too many people use these terms to justify what these people have done to them. Many of us like to play victim and use these terms to make the other person look or feel bad. But technically, not everyone who hurts you is in fact, a narcissist.  Here are my 4 ways to truly forgive. You may not agree with my methods, but they work for me, even if there is zero reconciliation whatsoever.  Apologize Anyway This method works well, because you're acknowledging and apologizing for your reaction. That's OKAY---it's not like you're say

5 Ways To Tell If Your Friend Has Your Best Interest at Heart

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Over the years I learned a lot about people. I'm pretty intuitive when it comes to people's energy. I'm not talking ~witchcrafty~ intuitive---I'm talking about true discernment. Don't get it twisted. You can tell a lot about how someone treats you, as well as if they prioritize you in a certain way. Keep in mind---people have busy lives and sometimes can't prioritize you for whatever reason. It doesn't mean they don't care for you or have your best interest at heart. I'm talking about those who make you a last resort sort of option. The kind of person I'm talking about will most likely avoid calling you, meeting up with you, however, they will send you a million videos from Instagram and Tiktok---(or as my gen-x lingo would have it, a "chain letter" of sorts---junk mail if you will.) They'll never just ask, "Hey, how are you?" You may see them at events, or bump into them and they'll spare a few minutes, but that's

3 Ways To Combat Anxiety & Agoraphobia

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Anxiety can grip our lives so tightly, that we feel like we're in a prison with no parol. We think that we'll never get out and that our lives are always going to be this way. To preface this next statement, please know I am not a therapist or medical professional, however, I'm a firm believer in treating the mind---not loading someone up with medication. I'd like to think that I have more 'qualifications' since I'm on the other side of the psychiatrist's sofa, having experienced anxiety, as opposed to someone just reading about it. I have suffered long enough with this. Ever since I was sixteen years old, I always thought I was having a heart attack. Do you know how much time and money went into visiting the ER just because I 'thought' I was having a heart attack? And yes, it is always best to get a full work up by your doctor or cardiologist, but once they give you a clean bill of health, know that it's anxiety playing its cruel tricks on y

5 Ways to Attract Positive Things In Your Life

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In all the years I have tortured myself with thoughts of the past, and longings of 'what was,' as well as the anxiety of what was to come---I wish I knew what I knew now, and how powerful the mind is. I read so many articles and books on the laws of attraction and how your mind has the ability to magnetize positive things in your life. I should have known to utilize all that I've learned---but better late than never. It's especially difficult when you go through traumatic events in your life, like a loss of a loved one, divorce, moving to a new home or losing a job. These are all huge life events that can take your positive mindset and bury it into a deep grave. At that point, there's no hope. Sometimes, we even play victim and tell ourselves that only bad things happen to us. The more we think bad things happen to us, the more bad things actually happen. But what if you can turn those thoughts around in the midst of your negative mindset?  I will share what has hel

Top 12 Things Unhealed People Will NOT Do

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What's your reaction when someone hurts you or offends you? What is your initial thought process when your brain (your ego) is triggered? I used to rattle off my mouth with knee-jerk reactions---without even thinking for a second what the repercussions would be. Before I make an initial response, I talk it out calmly. If talking it out calmly doesn't work, it can go one or two ways with me. I either let my emotions get the best of me, or I become distant and indifferent. Sometimes both. But as I go through life, I have become much more non-responsive, or at least, have thrown an attempt to talk it out. I'm not perfect---believe you me, but I'm at that point where I don't have time to deal with petty arguments, unnecessary drama or conflict. I won't allow it near me or around my home. I believe in forgiveness as well as forgetting---where I will never bring up the topic again, however, I also believe you do not need to reconcile with an unhealed person if that me

Why Would Yoga Be Dangerous?

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Years ago at the gym, they would hold all sorts of classes, including yoga. All of my friends used to go and said it was so peaceful. It was also said to be helpful with stretching exercises before and after a workout. Many told me it would help with my anxiety. It also teaches about helpful ways to breathe properly. Anyone I knew who did yoga seemed to be the most peaceful and chill people I've ever come across. Some "yogis" are very knowledgeable about spirituality, being their authentic selves, and self-awareness overall. I hear a lot of "self" in these descriptions. Self-awareness, self-consciousness, even the "S" capitalized in "Self." Self, self self.  2 Timothy 3:2 People will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boastful, proud, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy.  Yoga literally refers to “yoking” the mind to the source of divinity, and is the process of “intentional stopping of the spontaneous activity