Living Proof

(Madelene being such a great interviewer as I toggle around with that heavy camera in Ryan Nickulas' apartment in NYC.) This is just an update on our documentary, “ Gays & Lesbians of Faith ”. It was moving along quite well, until I hit a few road bumps that I wasn’t aware of, on the technical side and well, on the legal side too. While uploading extra segments up on my Youtube solely for the film, one of them was rejected due to copyright infringement. I was really confused because I was using royalty free music from www.freeplaymusic.com . You’d think it would be ‘free’ to use, but it’s not. You can use them for free if it’s a home movie that stays home - literally - no uploads for public viewing. This has been a major eye-opener for me as I had to remove many videos with background music from this website, however for the film in its entirety, I will be either playing my own music with my guitar or fiddling around with a music program I have on my Mac. I can hire someone ...

There have been many times where I have met with people of the LGBT community who would say to me, “Well, I used to be Catholic/Christian/Protestant etc., but I wasn’t accepted because I’m gay.” Nobody likes rejection and nobody wants to walk into an establishment (especially a house of God) and feel rejected right when they walk inside. On top of that, because of “people’s” rejections - it automatically sends a message that God Himself rejects them too. And that’s not an easy thing to deal with emotionally. They begin to reject “religion” altogether and either label themselves as “spiritual” or resort to atheism. Usually, there is no offer of another option - no source to guide them to other places that will accept them. Some seek out churches that are more accepting like the Episcopalian churches and others alike. Wherever they are most comfortable is the important thing. Even better if you have a personal relationship with God and are able to pray at home, rather than sit in a pew ...

While putting together part of my documentary and trying to organize all the pieces to the puzzle, I began to realize that I was missing an important segment of the film. I contacted the entertainer who was previously interviewed by us to ask if I had given her the wrong footage, and she said something that made sense - something I already knew - but all the more reason to move full steam ahead on this on my own. She said, “You do need a crew. Not only to help you channel your vision, but to help you fan the flames of your brilliance. I believe in you and know that the footage is somewhere!” Hours later I did find my footage, through the rubble of my madness, but her words kept taunting me a bit. I admit, it would be a helluva' lot easier working with a crew, but between the possible weakening of control and my shoestring budget, I doubt that’s going to happen anytime soon. On the other hand, if I found some creative minds to work with, perhaps people who are very much into film...

Through the process of interviewing people for the documentary, I came across one woman who wasn’t quite ‘right’ for the film. And, I hate to say that, because I do want to include most people of different lifestyles and backgrounds, but this was not a lifestyle - it was more of a mission in my opinion. “Linda”, a professional business woman set up the entire interview located in her high rise office building in Manhattan. We spoke about her life and how her religion vs. her lifestyle has affected her. It was going smoothly for a while, until she had admitted that she “turned” heterosexual. She stated she has always been a lesbian ever since she knew there were females on earth, but because she had a few bad experiences with women, she decided to give men a shot. I totally empathized for what she had been through, because all the women she had been involved with were verbally and physically abusive. Although Linda is very professional looking due to her career, she is more drawn to b...

Here's a segment that's just chopped up to fit Youtube, featuring Amy Beckerman and her lifetime partner, Ann Walling.

The other day when I had posted my little video to preview a tiny clip from my documentary, I had a few emails along with some commentary on my Youtube account. Some were asking to create the music for my project, while others were simply going on about how wrong homosexuality is. Luckily I received more positive and supportive feedback than anything, but that isn’t the point. I had posted an a little ad over at Blogcatalog, a site for bloggers to share their thoughts, their websites and to find more exposure. There is a section on their message boards where you can talk about general things. I thought it may have been a good idea to see if anyone was interested in doing a 15 minute interview for my film. Some of the responses were supportive and others, well, let’s just say they wanted more of a debate, rather than seeing this as an all inclusive event. I had one commenter say, “Haha, biblical scriptures to back you up? Uh, no. Even though Scripture CLEARLY admonishes against h...