Living Proof

I'm not sure what you think about when you hear the word "beautiful" in regards to a woman. Most think the generalized society's point of view: super model gorgeous, tall, thin, perfect features - stuff you see in magazines. I love air brushes. But seriously, there are women out there that are trying to achieve and maintain society's version of "beautiful" and I see it almost every single day of my life. There's a fine line of keeping up with your general appearance and obsessing over 'what other people think'.  The other day, I tweeted, "Being super beautiful must be like making a high salary. You won't settle for less, but the inevitable means 'retirement'. Common denominator: age. True beauty comes from within, and that lasts forever." I have seen the most "beautiful" women become the most ugly creatures on earth in a matter of seconds. I've also seen less attractive (whatever that means) become beau

(This photo was a Halloween shot at work. The theme was 'the futuristic office', so I chose my future would be working at home, hence the robe, towel, cup of coffee & flip flops. I'm actually wearing purple silk pajamas from Victoria Secret in there.) There was a time where I thought my life would only consist of a cubicle, dim florescent lights and a boss that would badger me for the rest of my days until the day I retired. Home life was all about resting. I didn't even notice the little things around me, like a beautiful view of the mountains, a hot cup of coffee to be enjoyed slowly or just listening to music, unwinding with a glass of wine. It was simple: get up, grab coffee on the way to work, sit in traffic, deal with bullshit at work, dive into traffic again, eat a quick dinner and go to sleep...do it all over again. I remember one of my coworkers had given our boss two weeks notice. One day, while sitting at the lunch table, we asked her why she was leavi

You can only do so much for someone you care for when it comes to helping a friend out with personal problems in their life. We all want to be that friend or spouse who is there for anyone at any given moment, “I’m here for you” seems to slip out of our mouths too loosely, and for some people, they take full advantage of that. In any friendship or intimate relationship, there needs to be a balance or it becomes a therapy session. Have you ever felt as though you’re someone’s therapist when you spend time with them? The conversation is one-sided and the person actually doesn’t even realize it. You try to connect with their eyes and nod here and there while dozing off into another land after the second hour of their session. In primitive days (yes caveman days, bear with me here), people were told to find a mate who has broad shoulders, not only to carry in the wood on a snowy day, but broad shoulders in terms of carrying your burdens, woes and problems in life. It should be a give

When I first heard the story about Jessica Vega who faked having cancer in order to receive money from donors to have a lavish wedding, I immediately thought what the rest of the crowd was chanting, “Evil! Evil! Evil!” I also heard, “Karma will get her back!” Many things were said in anger, and rightfully so. What kind of person would fake cancer - a disease that takes away our friends, that takes away our loves ones, as well as ourselves? Who can actually live with themselves with a clear conscience of telling such an outrageous lie? What kind of person can rip through the wallets of sympathetic hearts in order to gain a lavish wedding and materialistic things? But if you really think about this woman, she displays every symptom of Narcissistic Personality Disorder. It’s just as serious as bipolar disorder and schizophrenia. NPD has a few well know traits: Shows arrogant or haughty behaviors and attitude.  Is often envious of others or believes others are envious of them. 

I stopped caring for quite some time now. It was a conscious choice. It was a decision based upon my own freedom, sense of awareness and a glimpse into spiritual maturity. I prayed for understanding and discernment and the knowledge of other people’s motives or perhaps, why they do what they do and say what they say. I let that all go. It’s out of my control anyway, so why dissect it any further? Many, if not all people have some areas of insecurities in their lives. It’s normal. But what happens when that one area of insecurity becomes a jam session of insulting criticism upon somebody else? For example: one lady has five kids and she’s consulting or, giving her ‘best’ advice to a new mother to be. She automatically (in her mind) becomes “the expert”. And for some, you would think, rightfully so, but some parents, whether they have five or ten kids, aren’t the ‘best’ parents to take advice from. What about the naysayers - the people who discourage you in a big decision? And the th

"Love is not just looking at each other, it's looking in the same direction." ~Antoine de Saint-Exupery Yesterday I spent some time with mom for her 74th birthday. She always gets excited like a little girl on her big day, which is rare for many people. Dad was there and feeling much better. He was joking around, trying to hit me with his cane and being his ol’ sarcastic self again. He’s appetite finally came back too. At 3pm, the nurse and the social worker from hospice came over to check on him. As he was speaking to the social worker, he mentioned all the things he did in life, like running the fish market, a restaurant, had his own excavation company and made foundations for many, many homes around the area. He said to her, “Don’t get old. It goes just. like. that,” as he snapped his fingers. “One day, you own your own business and do well with it for years, and then it’s gone...just like that.” I didn’t know how to respond to it and thought the social worker would

It’s amazing how people can tear you down with words. Sometimes, those words live with you forever, even if an abundance of years fly by, those words are traveling with you, haunting you till the very end. Some feel you can let it haunt you or you can let it go - it’s your choice. But what if you just can’t shake it? What if those words keep echoing inside your mind for months, years, decades, until you decide to succumb to those hurtful words. It can actually dictate what you do in life, how you do things in life, and also, how you avoid certain things that you once enjoyed. Words have power. They can either lift you up or tear you down. What you say makes a difference. What others say also makes a difference, although many will disagree and say, “It doesn’t matter what others say about you” --- sometimes it does, especially if it’s someone you once loved and someone who once claimed to love you too. In my mind, words can be like little fireballs being thrown at you. They scar, leavin

The other day, someone called me a “pushover” just because I forgave someone too quickly. Without getting into much detail about it, if I hadn’t had the ability to forgive that person, or to let it go, then I’d be the one with the problem. For instance, I truly believe this person did not realize what they had said - or it was just something that normally flew out of their mouth from time to time. If you look at it like this - say I don’t forgive this person - this person walks away and never thinks about the “offense”, while I sit there brewing maybe for days, weeks or even months. Maybe I’ll have it in the back of my head for life. You never know. For me, once I forgive someone, it’s forgotten. This same person who called me a “pushover” also brought up an argument I had with a mutual friend. She asked, “What happened that time when ‘so & so’ started in with you?” I sat there...thinking...thinking and thinking. I truly had forgotten. Don’t get me wrong, forgiveness doesn’t nec

For a while now, I’ve been watching a few of my friends struggle with the dating scene. Either he or she is ‘too this ’ or ‘too that’ or just not the right fit. Hey, if you don’t like someone - whaddya’ gonna do, right? But what I’m seeing is more of an ' I’m getting up there in my years and I wanna meet the PERFECT person' type of mindset. There is no such thing as “the perfect person”. Let me say that again, there is no such thing as the perfect person, until you fall in love with them. Loving the imperfections of somebody; their idiosyncrasies and quirks are sometimes missed when that person isn’t there for them any longer. Before I get into my funny experiences with Madelene, let me just talk about my mom and dad for a moment. Ever since they retired and settled down into their empty nest, since everyone had since left, they did something different to keep the house exciting. They started by staying up late and having a cocktail together. Then it turned into getting up at

The other day while I was in the grocery store, I overheard two men debating over politics and the opinions over the republican candidates. Of course, it got heated because one was for Mitt Romney and the other for Obama. Arguing over politics is the same thing as arguing over religion and “set rules”, etc. No one wins and the thing is, even though you preach a good spiel about your thoughts, opinions and whatnot, you’re not doing anything but invoking anger in those who disagree, or simply do not believe. Of course, I do feel that if you share your beliefs and opinions with someone you ‘think’ is okay hearing it, then fine. I often see people bait others in just to attack their views. It’s pointless and childish. So this argument got heated and it almost came to blows. The funny thing is, after someone is finally elected, the arguments get less and less and no one says boo about anything regarding politics until election time or when someone makes a huge moral mistake in office. I tru

Are you one of those people who absolutely hates the thought of change - even miniscule things, like a simple routine altered, new furniture, or even Facebook’s new timeline? I’ve never seen so many people say, “I hate this” when anything changes - and then weeks or months later, they’re used to it (accepted it) and cultivated to the new way. Isn’t that much like life itself? I’ve been thinking a lot about it lately and how life has changed so drastically from just a few years ago. For a while, I was in denial, trying to hold onto something that has already passed me by. When we hold on too tightly, the more it slips out through your fingers. I received an email the other day from this full moon website. It tells you the phases of the moon and other interesting info regarding it. The email read, “A short thought on the subject of 'forgetting'. Normally, it is looked at as being negative – you suppress, you lose, you miss … At the same time, there has to be something salutary