Living Proof

The great debate of “is it a choice or is it genetics” has completely gone down the drain once I heard a friend of mine tell me why she “chose” to be a lesbian. I quickly interjected and said, “Nobody chooses this lifestyle”, hoping it would alleviate the stereotype that many religious people hold who feel it is a choice. However, in her case, it was a choice. With her permission, I’m able to write about this, although I will just refer to her as, “Jen” instead of using her real name. She asked me to write this, so that maybe my readers out there can give her a little advice or words of wisdom. She shared a personal story with me the other day that took me by surprise. While growing up, her stepfather sexually abused her for approximately four years. It started when she was eight years old and ended when she was around twelve. During the time she was attending middle school, her friends would always try to fix her up with boys. She wasn’t interested. In fact, she never even dated in ...

Everything I do, everything I have done, including everything I plan on doing, has one underlining motivational factor: Madelene. Whether or not other people view us as a "family unit", that’s exactly what we are, even without having children. She’s my family. She’s my wife, my best friend and the person I trust 110%. I seriously don’t have fun when I’m not with her. It’s not that I need her to be with me 24/7, but it feels like there’s something missing. If I’m out with friends and I order a delicious martini, I think, “Oh Mad would love this” , or if I order something I think she’d like, I’d save half and bring it home for her. It’s just not the same without her. We had gotten into an argument not too long ago -mind you we hardly ever argue, but a disagreement once in a while is healthy. This one was one of our biggies. She said to me, “Do you want me to move out so you can think clearly?” I stared at her thinking, “Oh my God, I couldn’t stay here if you left!” The thou...

With respect for my very close friend which I have gained inspiration for this post today, I will not mention names, but will give my two cents on a situation she got herself into, or perhaps, got her heart into. I will include my own experiences from the opposing side so that you know I am not speaking from a bias point of view. Maybe with suggestions and your comments, it’ll help her one way or another. This is a true story... “Bottom line” is what my friend always says right after she puts her heart out there explaining how she feels. The “bottom line” is usually followed with a “logical” standpoint; a factual basis on why she shouldn’t continue this relationship. “What about your heart? What does your heart say?” I asked, hoping her bottom line would soon be a bottomless pit of hope and undying love. Mind you, in my own personal opinion, “bottom lines” are only meant for those who are either verbally or physically abusive. Situations are different, depending all on what “you...