If you've ever been assumed about, I'm guessing you're probably frustrated over all the misconceptions people can dish out about you. I used to give a shit until I realized how imperfect we all are, whether we want to admit it or not. And being imperfect is a beautiful thing about life: we all share a commonality that draws us together, yet keeps many of us apart. We fear being 'figured out' - we fear that our vulnerabilities will be shown to the world. We're not the "perfect mother", "perfect wife", "perfect son", "perfect salesperson", "perfect singer", "perfect writer" -- and we're not. Not everyone's gonna love ya. Plain and simple. We try our hardest and it all gets flung out the flippin' window. But the thing is -- why are we caring and trying so much to prove our worth? It's a waste of time. I've quit caring about a lot of things in life (not careLESSly mind you), but in terms of certain things I used to go out on a branch for. I don't give a rat's ass about your politics. If you write about it - I ignore it. If you talk about, I walk away. And if you think you're "educating" others on what you think is "right", then you're sadly mistaken. Politics is like religion: no one wins and no one agrees. This next one may seem a bit uncaring, but it's not. At my old place of work, we used to donate money to a foundation that would designate your funds from your paycheck into the desired "cause". And believe me --- it was all "cause-worthy", but on my second year there, I started donating to a different cause that tugged at my heart. This organization would come into our company and literally beg us to donate. They wanted us to fill out the flyer and bring it back to the representative as soon as possible. I checked, "no" - only due to my previous obligations. Well, I was 'taken aside' and spoken to about how important this cause was. I listened to her go on and on about the organization and how important it was that everyone pitch in, so I told her, "Isn't it important to chip into a fund that supports cancer patients who do not have the proper insurance or even a penny to their name in order to get chemo?" In other words, I already committed to another cause. Leave. me. alone.
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| Ever feel like you're just throwing money at people? |
There's a fine line between advertising and begging. On this topic, it's about friends begging their friends on social media networks to buy their crappy makeup or holistic healing formulas in order to make their ends meet. Hey, I get it. We're all trying to make a buck or two in order to live and get by, but once you hit that 'low ball' option to beg your friends to pitch in for a product that they really don't need, you're eventually going to lose those friends one by one, perhaps slowly and perhaps quickly. I had a good friend email me and say, "Why are you so sick? I saw your status message and it looks like you are down with a cold again. Why not buy my product that heals all of your ailments." I'm not going to get into how I responded, however I will say, it was very direct and I "un-friended" her on Facebook. Don't try and sell me your crap that does absolutely nothing (because I tried it once before) and do not -- do not try to ride the wings of my wacky ailments - because I have many - and I would umm, have to purchase everything from you, IF your product was reputable. Buncha' medicine women trotting on my Facebook begging me to buy their concoctions. Go 'way! In fact, when a good friend asks about my book, I send it to them. I don't want to profit from my friends. That is the cheesiest maneuver ever. Advertise. Don't bet. It makes a HUGE difference. Trust me on this one. If your friend needs a makeover, give her some products for free. If your friend is sick, then by all means, help them without asking for money! Seriously --- would you charge your friend if you brought them chicken soup when they were sick? Then think of this in the same aspect. Stop being so goddamn petty and git' yer' shit straight. /end rant.
For more of Deb's articles, please visit: www.debrapasquella.com or join her on Facebook and Twitter. Check out her cooking blog for some of her famous recipes!
