Monday, December 16, 2013

The Sad Truth About Facebook

There are times when I'm okay. Most times I'm okay I prove it with a smile. Most times when I'm not okay, I also wear a smile. Facebook tells people I'm happy. "You seem so happy lately," because I plopped up a funny post or a photo that seemed jovial. I'm not going to bog down someone's feed with nonsensical depressive quotes or statuses. I try to be upbeat, but I am much more than my Facebook status or tweet. I think it's sad when friends and family only check social media to see if their loved ones are "okay". What about a phone call or text or even a visit? Our way of life is social media, but I'm not going to write a status message saying, "Well, today I felt depressed, but I'm okay now." And I have those days believe me. They pass quickly as they come, and sometimes, they linger a little too long for my liking. I'm like anyone else. I have my limits and sometimes, I get angry or frustrated at certain things, but I refuse to start rambling off my problems on social media, unless it has a funny curve to it. The fact is: nobody cares what you post up. Why drum up the drama? Maybe I hide behind my humor, but that's the way I deal with things. If I didn't, I'd be dead. My life is messy, and sometimes it's a lot of fun. I'm a bit of a recluse from time to time. It has no reflection on how I feel about anyone. I can pop an entire bottle of vitamin D and it still sometimes leaves me in a funkity-funk. I love hearing how others perceive me based on social media. It baffles my mind to think that so many people out there rely on the well-being of someone's update. I was tempted to write, "I'm not okay." And that's it. Of course that's one of those good ol' attention whore status messages and it will get some buzz ---- but why even do it? You wanna know the worst of it? Nobody cares that you're not okay --- they care about the entertainment of it. That's the sad truth. They want to see the next status message - the next chapter on this saga of your Facebook life. They eat it up like a soap opera and I've seen so many people fall for this pseudo compassion.

If you really want to show that you care, call that person up. Make a surprise visit. Make plans with that person. Show that their worth your time and effort. Even send a private message to their account if you see an 'alarming status' --- ask if they're alright. Don't just leave some lame cliché -- "Things can be worse," or "Time heals." and "My thoughts are with you." Bullshit. Your thoughts are, "Wow I can't believe she wrote that on his/her Facebook account." Maybe I'm wrong. Maybe your thoughts are legit. But this whole social media crap has become a way for some people to actually believe they can check up on someone's well-being. It takes a whole lot more. People not only hide behind smiles, but they hide behind their status messages and monitors.

For more of Deb's articles, please visit: www.debrapasquella.com or join her on Facebook and Twitter. Check out her cooking blog for some of her famous recipes!

3 comments:

Elephant's Child said...

I spend way too much time connected to the computer as it is. And am more than grateful that I have not dipped my toes in the Farcebook waters.
And yes, real communication does it for me every time.
Hugs, and I hope your bad/sad days are in the minority.
PS: Word verification today is Sorrdame - which made me smile. I hope there is a little soreness as possible in your future.

the walking man said...

That about sums it up.

Katy Anders said...

You're right - people don't usually want to hear you're not okay. "How are you?" isn't a real question.

Which is alright, I guess, because I don't tell people when i'm doing badly anyway. if I were doing so badly that i needed to tell people about it, I would write a hilarious blog post about whatever it was.

Because that way,. people would actually read it.