Thursday, May 05, 2011

Is Love a Temporary Madness?

Years ago when I was struggling over a breakup, a good friend of mine really came through for me. She gave me emotional support, friendship, and most of all, she made me laugh a lot. It was the best medicine ever. She also said some really profound things that made me look at my situation a bit differently. Today, as I was cleaning out my desk for our big move soon, I found an email I had printed out from years ago. I’m not a clutter bug, but for whatever reason, I kept this printed out email for years, folded up and tucked into an envelope that was in my filing cabinet in an unmarked folder. When I read it, I went straight into my email online and found the electronic version so I could share part of it with you all. During that time, I was in the midst of writing my book and sharing my raw and emotional thoughts with my friend. We tossed around quite a few long-winded emails. This one email, I was always save...

“I am looking forward to grandkids, and playing and retiring. I actually can't wait. Life is a beautiful journey, and I look forward to sagging boobs, and lines on my face and looking at my partner who is more wrinkled then I, and still finding her to be the most beautiful woman alive.

Very deep heavy passage. Here is what I read recently off of someone's profile. It is a line from a movie, which of course I just rented.

‘Love is a temporary madness. It erupts like an earthquake and then subsides. And when it subsides you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots have become so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the promulgation of promises of eternal passion. That is just being "in love" which any of us can convince ourselves we are. Love itself is what is left over when being in love has burned away, and this is both an art and a fortunate accident. Your mother and I had it, we had roots that grew towards each other underground, and when all the pretty blossom had fallen from our branches we found that we were one tree and not two.’ - Captain Corelli's Mandolin

It went on in the movie to say, it doesn't sound so exciting, but it is. For me, I know that. Because when I was "in love" and then when the passion died, there was still so much love that I didn't know where to go with it all. It had nothing to do with sex, although I was still attracted to them. One made my knees weak always. Another made my soul weak. But ultimately, for both of them, we were not meant to be together as lovers, just friends. And I am ok with that, today.

Sex is nothing in the scheme of things, however it is an important expression of love. It is not something that should be freely shared, at least for me its not, yet it needs to be shared. However, love comes from your heart and your soul and it is meant for us to live that love. It is our greatest gift from God, and also his last commandment.”
~Author known only by me

I will always be grateful for this email. Thank you, my friend.

For more of Deb's articles, please visit: www.debrapasquella.com