Tuesday, June 19, 2012
Are You the Luster or the Lover?
It's hard to tell when someone says, "I love you", but merely loves the idea of the relationship. Is it "you", or is it the entire situation? Is it "you", or is it the fact they love being around your family and friends? Is it "you", or are they satisfying their lustful desires and playing the role of "the lover"? Through my own experience, I once dated someone who loved the idea of my life--- not me. She loved my family, my friends, where I lived, what we all did on the weekends and played the role of "the lover". Hindsight 20/20, it wasn't me that she loved at all. Looking back, there were no actions of love set in place. There were tons of words that flew from her mouth, but nothing out of the ordinary that 'showed' me that she cared. She was nice to me, we laughed together and had great times, but no real true sediments of love. I was blinded of course and overlooked those necessities because I truly loved her and showed her in every way I did. Sadly, it wasn't mutual. Of course I can assume and she can tell you a whole different story. There's a great saying someone once told me, I don't know the original author of this, but it goes: "There's always three sides to the story. Yours, theirs, and the truth." It makes so much sense because sometimes the "truth" gets muddled into a cornucopia of rattled emotions. It's like debating over religion - it gets you nowhere to argue over it. (And yet we always do.)
Have you ever thought about how you truly feel about your partner? Are you the luster or the lover? And sometimes, most lusters don't even realize how they truly feel, which makes the entire game so unfair.
For more of Deb's articles, please visit: www.debrapasquella.com
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