Saturday, August 02, 2008

Cawfee Tawk

My morning started as I clumsily shuffled my way through the living room to make it into the kitchen. With one eye opened and one eye closed, I tried the best I could to scoop the coffee grinds out of the can and into the coffee maker. It didn’t go too well. I now have a trail of grinds everywhere but inside the machine. I attempted to make breakfast for Madelene. We prefer egg whites, so I made an egg white omelet. Cracking the eggs was the easy part, however trying to get the yolk to stay inside was another story. Twice, the yolk fell onto my foot, leaving a sticky yellowy mess. Not a good morning as you can see. Madelene woke up to the sounds of obscenities coming out from the kitchen area.

It’s Saturday morning. Her most challenging days at work are on Saturdays. I try the best I can to wake up before her, make her breakfast, prepare her lunch and sit down and talk to her. She always insists that I sleep in a little, but I want to spend time with her before her workday starts. I want to spend time with her before I’m 8 hours without her. I told her that I do this selfishly because I love her. It’s all about me.

There are days where I’m home all day and she’s working-- yet she’ll go to the store and pick a few things up when I’m able to do that myself. She says she likes doing that because she knows it makes me happy. She does it because she loves me.

Where is this mushy bullshit going you ask?

Love. It’s not only a feeling you have: it’s actions applied to those feelings. It’s knowing that you would do absolutely anything for that person even if it killed you. Love is knowing and understanding all negative circumstances and root causes of bad moods. I’m not trying to compete with how Corinthians defines love, however it’s right on the money. There is no jealousy or bitterness. If so, those issues need to be addressed immediately. It’s complete forgiveness if one is offended or hurt. It’s always knowing that the person who stands right in front of you that you’re in love with, loves you more than you love them. Don’t take that last sentence literally----it’s demonstrating that there is no doubt in your mind that your significant other adores the hell outa’ you. Everyone needs reassurance.

There was a time back in 2000 where Madelene and I were eating at a local restaurant not talking to one another because we had unresolved issues. I looked over at an elderly couple at the next table over. I listened their conversation. From what I got out of it: they’ve been married for over 50 years, raised a few kids and have many grandchildren. There were absolutely no breaks in their conversation. They never ran out of things to say to one another. They laughed and joked around and apparently----enjoyed one another. I felt one of the 7 deadly sins: envy. I absolutely envied these two people for sticking it out and enjoying every single moment of their relationship right into their golden years. How rare!

Ever since Madelene and I have resolved our past issues, as all relationships go through, there is nothing in the gray area anymore. Everything is completely out in the open. As a result, I finally got what I envied: having my best friend for a partner. We’re yip-yapping from the early morning hours until late in the evening right before we close our eyes to go to bed. Another fringe benefit of having everything out in the open is that the sex only gets better. (Too much info probably), but when everything is completely released where there is nothing but raw honesty, the final result is a happy and healthy relationship. Is it perfect? By all means, no. Does it make us both happy? I can only speak for myself, but I have never been happier for such a depressed sap that I usually am.

So instead, Madelene and I had a good laugh at the mess I created in the kitchen and the yellow remains of the yolk still left on my foot. She left to go to work with a smile on her face because of her silly partner who put forth excruciating effort to get those egg whites on the dining room table by 7am.

And that’s proof of my love.