Wednesday, February 28, 2007


It’s amazing how fearful I’ve become ever since I’ve created this blog. I thought that my words and my thoughts would trigger some sort of bond with those struggling with homosexuality and coming to God. My book was already out and I needed another outlet as far as writing went.

Then, I came across other Christians who were completely appalled by the fact that I was a lesbian writing about Christian matters. How can a lesbian be Christian? How can a Christian be a lesbian? All these questions and judgmental remarks towards me left me wondering if I really wanted to surround myself with other Christians.

But, what is the actual definition of a Christian?

-Professing belief in Jesus as Christ or following the religion based on the life and teachings of Jesus.
-Relating to or derived from Jesus or Jesus' teachings.
-Manifesting the qualities or spirit of Jesus; Christ-like.
-Relating to or characteristic of Christianity or its adherents.
-Showing a loving concern for others; humane.

Professing belief – having faith is all about Christianity. Loving God with all your heart and loving your neighbor, right? Quite a few “Christians” came onto my site to tell me their beliefs and opinions opposing my homosexual lifestyle. I’ve gone over these things many times as you all know. They threw scriptures at me and relentlessly judged me and said I was going to hell. I can totally see how other gays and lesbians would turn away from God altogether due to human judgments. It’s sad, because we’re all in this together.

There is this one gentleman (who will remain anonymous) that ridicules me for being a lesbian and having faith in Christ at the same time. Now, my relationship with my partner is a monogamous one. I love her, just as a man would love his wife or vise/versa. To me, our love isn’t any different than that. We focus on God – and the first thing in the morning before starting our day, we pray to God first. He comes first. Well, this man comes onto my site and says that I’m placing my relationship before Christ. He doesn’t even know me to even make such a remark like that. What about husbands and wives who put each other first, yet go to church every Sunday and have faith in God? I mean, how can you judge a loving relationship if God is involved? You just can’t.

Well, here’s a little background on Mr. Anonymous that I’ve obtained. Mr. Anonymous is a divorcee that is seeking a new relationship with a woman on a personal website. Now, to me there’s nothing wrong with that at all. I don’t judge him, nor would I give him any derogatory remarks about him seeking another woman on a personal ad. Fine. Whatever floats your boat. Tons of people do it.

What gets me is, he repeatedly told me to ‘repent of my sin’ and give up my lifestyle. Then God won’t throw me into hell. He says that ‘homosexuality is a sin’ according to the scriptures listed in Leviticus. Well, what about him? First of all, Leviticus is in the Old Testament. Those laws no longer apply. Now, Mr. Anonymous is a divorcee seeking another woman. In Leviticus and in the New Testament, it goes on to say that if a man divorces his wife, and she is still alive – and the man decides to marry another woman – that is considered adultery. As long as his ex-wife is still alive, he’s doomed.

His argument is that he’s repented – so he can go on continuing to seek out a new relationship. Now, what about my scenario? Mr. Anonymous says that if I don’t repent, I’ll go to hell. But even if I repent (which I don’t think loving someone is a sin anyway) then I still cannot continue a relationship with the woman I love so much. But he can. So he applies the laws to fit his life. His sin is just as bad as mine. Now, again, I’ll say that loving someone is not the same as promiscuous behavior. He believes I’m committing a sin.

In Corinthians and Romans they speak of the promiscuity aspects of homosexuality. It was considered dirty.

But first, I want to display “Sometimes Saintly Nick’s” comment on a previous post of mine.

“Mr. Anonymous’ theology is as poor as his Biblical exegesis, which is in reality isogesis. Here are a few comments on Leviticus 18:22:The passage in the ancient Hebrew is clearly talking about male-male sex acts, specifically anal sex. The issue was penetrating an anus with a penis, this making the penis literally “unclean” to the point of forbidding entry into a vagina. I wonder if the same prohibition would not also apply to male/female anal sex?Using the word "homosexuality" in some English translations makes the text appear to condemn lesbian activity as well. The latter behavior is definitely not mentioned in the original Hebrew text of this passage. In fact, lesbian behavior is not mentioned anywhere in the Hebrew Scriptures.The term "homosexuality" has two distinct meanings in English. Sometimes it refers to sexual behavior (what some people do). Sometimes it relates to sexual orientation (what some people are). One reader might conclude from an English translation that homosexual orientation is criticized in the Bible; others might assume that homosexual behavior is criticized. However, the word "homosexual" was first used in the very late in 19th century C.E. There was no Hebrew word that meant "homosexual." Thus, whenever the word is seen in an English translation of the Bible, one should be wary that the translators might be inserting their own prejudices into the text."

People are so unforgiving if you really think about it. They constantly compare and judge everyone around them. Is it that they feel the need to make themselves happy by trying to make others unhappy? There are people who dedicate their blogs to the people they hate the most. They spew nasty remarks about how ‘bad’ these people behave, when they are simply loving other human beings monogamously. Yes, there are a lot of promiscuous homosexuals, but don’t forget, there are many promiscuous heterosexuals too. We’re all human. We make mistakes. We have to accept that as humans, we have the flaw of making numerous mistakes, but we have the advantage of Jesus’ forgiveness. His gift is paid in full for you. I think a lot of Christians forget that. Their precious time and effort is wasted on ‘playing judge’ and making others feel horrible about themselves.

If it weren’t for judgmental and cruel people claiming to be Christians, I bet you anything that the suicide rate in the homosexual community would lessen. How many times have you heard a homosexual kid or even an adult say, “Oh my GAWD I can’t ever tell my family I’m gay! They’d disown me!” And they speak of their family, who are supposed to love and support them. Now for those parents that are as accepting to my lifestyle as my parents are, think of it like this… If my own parents accept and love me ‘as is’, what makes other people think God isn’t capable of doing the same for me…or the same for you? Do we feel that God is inadequate of doing such a thing? Do we feel that God doesn’t have the power to love and go beyond who we love?

There’s another topic I want to touch upon. A reader emailed me recently and asked me why I bashed gay pride parades on Mark’s site. Well, here are my reasons:

Most gay pride parades have people prancing around topless or half naked with picket signs claiming they want rights. But the thing they have to realize is, (in my opinion at least) is that presentation goes a long way. If you want to get your message across, do it tactfully, instead of shedding clothing and acting promiscuously in front of the world. The people who do that, (not saying that all do) give homosexuals a bad name. They’re looked upon as perverts. I can totally understand why. And most of all, I will not partake in that kind of thing. It’s trashy to me.
The word “PRIDE” is offensive to me.

Definition of the word “pride”:

1. a high or inordinate opinion of one's own dignity, importance, merit, or superiority, whether as cherished in the mind or as displayed in bearing, conduct, etc.

2. the state or feeling of being proud.

3. a becoming or dignified sense of what is due to oneself or one's position or character; self-respect; self-esteem.

4. pleasure or satisfaction taken in something done by or belonging to oneself or believed to reflect credit upon oneself: civic pride.

It’s an arrogant way to describe yourself in my opinion. To be prideful is to put things before God. To be humble is to show that you’re loving, caring and put others before yourself. A lot of what the gay pride parades stand for are sometimes shocking.

Another issue of mine is that we finally have the right to get ‘married’ or have a civil union in New Jersey. Yay! This is great news. We get the same benefits as a man and a woman. Now, the gay and lesbian community are barking because it’s not called ‘a marriage’. It’s called a ‘civil union’. Who cares! Let them digest this first. This is a huge step for us. Why are they sabotaging it already? As soon as the gays and lesbians realize that a civil union is exactly the same thing as a heterosexual marriage, then it’ll be more accepted in other states and readily available for those couples waiting in line to be united. So please, for the love of God, accept what is offered and be happy that we get the same benefits now. What’s in a name anyway? It baffles me that they want to push it to the extreme and make everything into a huge fiasco. Some people are way too pushy about things and it really makes me wonder about their motives and why they want to get married in the first place. I would be happy with just a small ceremony and close friends and family joining us. But that’s just me. I don’t care about the labels, I care about what my partner and I have as a couple and what we own, and what would go to her if I were to leave this world. I want to know that it was hers and not anyone else’s. (Not that I have much anyway!)

So as I got sidetracked with my “Christianphobia” topic, I’m also relating to the Christians who belittle the gay and lesbian community. I can see how they get frustrated with some of us when we put so much in their face. But there are homosexuals who are genuinely in love with their partner and don’t want to make a huge fuss over who accepts them. We’re normal everyday people like you and we just want the ‘hating’ and the ‘judging’ to stop. I know that’s unrealistic, but just because a few bad eggs made the rest look bad, doesn’t mean the whole batch is bad. And the same goes out to those Christians who are categorized as ‘haters’. There are the fundamentalist-extreme types that make it hard for the gay and lesbian people to accept them as well. So it works both ways.

I guess the unknown is scary to many of us. We fear things that we are unfamiliar with. We don’t want to deal with it, or we delve into it as if it were our business. Again, two extreme ends of the spectrum. Maybe if we didn’t focus so much on how other people were living their lives, we would be much happier. Or maybe we’re content on trying to ‘fix’ other people? I don’t know. Whatever the reason is for how we behave towards things that are unfamiliar to us, it has to be taken with a grain of salt. We react in different ways and we’ll never be convinced otherwise if our hearts believe so strongly about a certain issue. We can’t change anyone’s minds, but we can definitely try to mind our own business and focus on God more and focus on the matters that pertain to us.


Miss 1999 said...

"Yes, there are a lot of promiscuous homosexuals, but don’t forget, there are many promiscuous heterosexuals too. We’re all human. We make mistakes."

Amen, to that Sister! I know several people, gay and straight, that I could get an STD just talking about their sex lives. Promiscuousness is wrong regardless of a persons sexuality.

"If it weren’t for judgmental and cruel people claiming to be Christians, I bet you anything that the suicide rate in the homosexual community would lessen."

I'd like to give another big AMEN! I bet the suicide rate would go down period, for those who are gay and straight if people were a little more loving and forgiving, and actually "loved others as God loved us."

"If you want to get your message across, do it tactfully, instead of shedding clothing and acting promiscuously in front of the world. The people who do that, (not saying that all do) give homosexuals a bad name."

Another HUGE Amen. I get so sick of seeing that shit. You know, it does give homosexuals a bad name. It's absolutely obsene that ANYONE needs to have pride about being gay, straight, or otherwise. Who you fall in love with and/or sleep with, is only a small part of who you are. If more people would realize that, and stop with all of this gay AND straight pride stuff, the happier and more accepting people would be.

Once again, Deb, an outstanding post! You've hit a lot of things right on the head. Keep it up, girl! *Hugs*

Steff said...

You pointed out that the actions of a few can give the whole lot a bad name. I think this is particularly true when it comes to Christianity. There are radical extremist Christians that believe and act upon the "turn or burn" theory. Their unacceptance and intolerance seems to bleed across the whole range of Christians.

I am a Christian, but I also believe that homosexuality is a sin. I hope that doesn't put me in the bunch that cause people to be Christianphobic as you put it.

I think there has to be give and take on each side. There needs to be mutual respect from all people involved. If you expect for people to be open to the concept that a lesbian can also be a Christian then it stands to reason that you would be open to Christians that do not believe that is right.

I'd say that you're not going to change my opinion, but I will always be willing to listen to the other side of the coin. And I'd like to think that I can do that without belittling you or showing you disprespect.

As always, this is a topic that makes me think and reflect.

Dan said...

How can a lesbian be Christian? How can a Christian be a lesbian?

And how can Christians continue to ask these questions?

The way I see it, we don't choose our sexual orientation. I didn't wake up one day and say "Starting today I think I'll like boobs". It just happened. And I'm not going to wake up tomorrow and say "Staring today I think I'll starting liking penises". No way. I can't will that.

But you did choose your religion (I assume) and so instead of welcoming you with open arms, I'm still amazed that Christians question you about your preferences. Oy vey!

Nancy said...

I can hardly stomach reading about the people who tell you that you are automatically going to hell for being who you are. Deb, it honestly makes me cry. After all, I would guess you would have picked an easier way to live life if it had been completely up to you. But it wasn't, and here you are.

You must get sooo sick and tired of being judged constantly, but I hope you can see how many people love and accept you just as you are.

Jen said...

Girlfriend, I cannot express to you HOW happy I am to read something like this from a fellow lesbian. Let me just say that I am a Christian and I am GAY - I've been a lesbian my whole life and I am TOTALLY incapable of feeling the way I do about women for men. My partner and I have been together for a little over 2 years. She is a Christian, as am I - we've done mission trips together (in the closet) with our church, etc... hiding all the while, wanting to do the work of God but knowing our congregation would NEVER accept us. Well, unavoidably and overdue, the Pastor and his wife found out about us - I'd like to leave the details undisclosed... Anyway, they talked with us - proceeded to tell me that they had told the "key leaders" in the church as well as my best friend - WHO is the mother of my Godchildren - both of whom I am EXTREMELY close to. Well, honey, the SHITE hit the fan! We were "thrown" into counseling with someone who had "never" counseled lesbians before. My partner and I never WANTED this lifestyle - in other words, it's not our choice... We actually thought they were correct when they told us (since we both felt we had been attracted to women our whole lives) "Satan lied to us when we were infants - somehow, God turned his back on us and Satan crepped into our rooms, and lied, probably while we were sleeping in our cribs" - We were then given a "become a NON homosexual" workbook to "do together" - then we were to read these books by Andrew Comisky who was gay and is now SAVED from that lifestyle, married with children. After that we were suppose to get back in touch with them for further counseling... So we also stopped all physical contact thinking we were cursed and then we did just as they told us to, called them back and NOTHING - no return calls - NOTHING! They just dropped us like they never knew us! Then we were totally confused. Finally, we got smart and did the RIGHT thing, we turned to God... And you know what? I believe He's blessed us and taken us down a road where I feel better about myself then I ever have! EVER! I actually have self esteem now! I did more research to find books and info regarding people who had been down the same road as we were - I found a totally parallel life in a man and author named Mel White. His book, "Stranger at the Gate" began the healing process within me, and within my partner as well. I think you will receive a lot from it too. You should check it out. From one devout Christian to another, PLEASE read it. I am SO happy to have you on MySpace and that we've so much in common. My partner and I now are living a healthy love life together, blessed by God. Let me hear from you! Hugs and happiness to you and your partner.

~Deb said...

Miss 1999: Sexual orientation doesn’t mean promiscuity. People get so confused over the concept of a homosexual relationship as opposed to a heterosexual relationship. And, think about this – when an average heterosexual person thinks about the word, “homosexual”, it usually falls into the category of a sexual nature. Maybe because the ‘man’ thinking it loves the idea of two women together, or the woman thinking it may feel that all gays are too sexual and it’s “gross” for two men to be together DUE to sexual side of it. But when they think of heterosexual relationships, they think of a union, holding hands in the park, marriage, kids, etc…etc…etc…. Thank you for your input! I love hearing from you!

Steff: I have no problem with Christians who believe that homosexuality is a sin. I can totally see why they believe that. But the ones who tell me “I’m going to hell”, are the ones I’m speaking of. Who are they to tell ‘me’ or anyone else that is homosexual that we’re going to hell? Only God can determine that. I’ve backed up my theory and beliefs with scriptures as well as my own personal experiences I have had with God. Each of our relationships with God are unique and meant to be personal. Just as your relationship with God is personal. You have strong faith and believe that certain things aren’t good for you. In Romans it explains that if you feel that a certain food is bad for you - then don’t eat it, however, if another person doesn’t feel it’s bad, do not condemn him/her. (Basically speaking about judging others.) I will give you the passage verses if you want them – it’s really interesting though! I would never try to change your opinion. That’s not what I’m about. I’m here to tell my thoughts and how I feel. I think there are negative sides to both Christians and homosexuals, and positive sides about each of them too. I never felt that you belittled me. I appreciate your input very much, Steff!

Dan: That’s what I’m saying – I knew I was gay ever since I can remember! I knew that I was attracted to women more than I was with men. And, don’t get me wrong, I am not a ‘manhater’, however, I choose to have intimate relationships with women – or the person I fall in love with. Some people don’t understand that. Again, it’s personal and different for everyone.

Nancy: I knew that I would get judged immediately upon speaking out, but I never knew how much. I also don’t want to come off as this whiny lesbian who wants to be 100% accepted. I just want to speak my mind and profess my love for God. I also see flaws in the gay community which I confess to – I can’t stand those gay pride parades! I guess the ones that make it seem more promiscuous than it is are the ones who ruin the experience for me. We’ll always be judged – anyone who lives on this earth will, but people like you are rare – and I’m happy to know that there are still loving people in the world who are tolerant and see things in a positive light. Thanks Nance!

Jen: You went through the same thing I did! I was apart of this church that basically shunned gays. They threw us in a gay ministry and reiterated that God hates the sin, but not the sinner. True. But Jesus paid the full price for everyone. Loving another person is not wrong Jen! And never let people make you feel bad about yourself. No one can take the relationship you have with God away – no one can take God’s love for you away. I’m glad that your faith won the battle and you didn’t lose hope. So, the churched shunned you as well – meanwhile, back at the pews, there are adulterers, liars, thieves as well as gluttons sitting and listening to the pastor being “accepted”. Ironic, huh? Keep on with your faith and remember that God knows your heart. Don’t let anyone take that away from you! Thank you for stopping by and God bless you & your partner!

Pittchick said...

I think you're such a strong person for being able to face such criticism and hatred on a daily basis.
I just don't understand how one human being can honestly think they're better than another just because their beliefs differ.

Catch said...

Deb, Deb, Deb....when are you going to stop paying any attention to those negative people? No one has any right to tell another person they are going straight to hell for anything. As soon as those words come out of their mouth..stop listening or reading. they have the problem...not you. Stay in your loving relationship with cant go wrong. Christians should be loving, caring and forgiving and non judging. Some are, some arent..its not up to us to sort them out. You are a good person, you try your very best to be a good Christian. I have watched you defend yourself since I started reading your blog...IM tired of seeing people bash you. Dont worry about them...concentrate on YOU. They suck up negative generate postitive energy. Stay the course Sweety!

~Deb said...

Pittchick: People have been fighting over “religion” for years – and it’ll never change. Their beliefs are considered “truth” for them. But in the process, they’re literally killing one another over which God is the real God.

Catch: Well, I’m definitely not soaking up the negativity thank God! As I’ve said before, my faith is so strong, that it’s practically knowledge to me. So, no one can tear me down because it’s just as if someone said to me, “Deb, you have no hair.” Well, I believe I have hair, I see I have hair, I “know” I have hair (which needs to be cut soon!!!) so how can they tell me what I believe so strongly? So it doesn’t bother me at all. I just want to tell them my part about how I believe, and how I know that God loves all of us – even living on earth as ‘sinners’. He would not have put us on here if He knew we would fail. Are we all going to hell? I mean, the whole concept of them picking & choosing their sin and which one is better absolutely baffles me, Catch. I'm sure you know what I mean though. They can banter with me all they want, but they can't change my mind. Just as you're a strong person with your beliefs, that's a personal thing that can't be altered. I admire that!

Bossy said...

I know a few straigt folks who are tramps, I know a few gay people who are tramps..makes no never mind who your sleeping with, tramps are a plenty everywhere,,

great post as always...u know i love u:)

Anonymous said...

GOD melted them into nothingness.. to this day they still are finding burnt up bones where Sodom and Gomorrah use to be.. after they melted into ash.. their spiritual body's were injected into a pit in HELL and they are still screaming and scratching at the sides of their pits as you read this. Why? because they did not obey GODS law.

If you're willing to take the chance on thinking that you have everything figured out.. I am even frightened for you.. Think about the second you do die and you wake up in one of these PITS we are hearing about.. Its that second you will realize you had nothing figured out.. And that you should have been prudent.. you now will remain in a pit and your spiritual body will burn forever as you claw at the sides of your pit.. Forever is a long time and a big chance.. I say why take the chance.. the Bible is very REAL. Satan has worked very hard into making you feel laxed.. And into thinking GOD is way to nice to allow such a thing.. this is the trick! God is nice to his children.. if you're not obeying his laws you don't belong to him anymore.. You're considered a bastard.

Sodom and Gomorrah were guilty of many sins not just Homosexuality.. But their sexual perversions were what did them in.. they were not tolerated by GOD. Judgment was swift and corrected the situation promptly.

God speaks against Homosexuals in the Old Testament.. GOD sounds like he means what he is saying:

LEV 18:22 Thou shalt not lie with mankind, as with womankind: it is abomination.
LEV 20:13 If a man also lie with mankind, as he lieth with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination: they shall surely be put to death; their blood shall be upon them.

DEU 23:17 There shall be no whore of the daughters of Israel, nor a sodomite of the sons of Israel.

Being Bisexual is just as bad as being a Homosexual! who are you kidding? Do you think you will get a nicer PIT in HELL then the Homosexual? Let me help you understand this.. When you die you will be judged.. I do not care what you think you are or what religion you think you are right now.. Every single disgusting perverse act you do is marked against you! this is called SIN.. God is not letting your disgusting perverted soul into Heaven! You should be repenting and pleading the blood of Jesus on your life and washing this filth off yourself.. If you continue with an "I don't care attitude" you're in for a big surprise! Because one day you just might wake up in another dimension.. And start screaming and burning and never stop screaming and burning.. You have heard some good news today.. that good news is the name Jesus.. Check him out! If you are worshipping a Goat, Goddess Diana, Demons, Snakes, Birds, Earth, Wind, Satan, Buddha, Cats or Pigs.. whatever you think your sick beliefs are.. There all a one way ticket to HELL!.. Jesus is waiting for you with open arms right now!

According to the Bible Sodomites are in serious danger of Hellfire.. Homosexuals have to fight the unclean spirit that is causing them sin.. This isn't easy because the Homosexual demon is a powerful spirit.. And sets itself up in the persons life at a very young age. And attaching itself directly to the persons soul.. by doing this is has full control over the persons thoughts.. This causes the person to actually think that these unclean thoughts are their own thoughts.. As time goes by the homosexual starts to accept these thoughts as being "who I am".. This "who I am" thinking advances into what's called as "coming out of the closet".. When this occurs the homosexual has become a powerful tool for Satan..

Satan loves homosexuals.. And will usually set them up with good careers in something Satan is in control of i.e.. Entertainment.. any form of the Media.. Satan wants them to grow.. The more homosexuals there are the more souls Satan gets to join in a Furnace of Fire.. GOD hates Homosexuality!.. By the homosexuals "coming out of the closet" they now will start thinking that GOD made them this way.. This is not true! Satan made you this way!.. As the homosexual starts to accept their new lifestyle.. they will start acting homosexual in public.. When this happens it encourages other homosexuals that were "on the fence" with the unclean spirit to step forward and act on their homosexual thoughts. This is like a domino effect.. You have seen it working over the years..

Homosexuals are making huge advances in the world.. As you watch this.. You are actually watching Satan make advances in the world! God slowed it down with launching a plague on Homosexuals. He had to slow down this sickness because certain things have to happen like a Revival.. And homosexuals were advancing much to fast (Homosexual Wildfire).. This Death spirit God sent was also a wakeup call.. many homosexuals just adjusted and defended themselves with condoms and assumed AIDS was something that was not directed towards them since it also took out some drug addicts etc..

I know innocent people also have been victims of this plague Innocent souls go directly to Heaven.. Gods not concerned about that since he knows that they are LIVING now anyway.. When God let JOBS children get slaughtered by Satan.. he was not concerned about it because he knew that their souls would be LIVING in Heaven that second. Its the Soul that is not innocent that God is worried about.. He is not happy when you send yourself to HELL.. In fact he has given you all the resources to defend yourself from this fate.. He sent his only begotten son to get hammered to a cross and die for you! God is saying here is my sons blood use it to wash yourself from all sin and save yourself from HELLFIRE! Why are you sending yourself to HELL?

Leesa said...

Thanks for the long comment on my blog today - funny thing is that I got a "spam" comment to the entry "Looking for ~deb" that simply read, "Nice site" and had a link to its spam.


You gave a definition for a Christian, and what I heard in my head was, "We are defined more by our actions than our words."

And I have read Sometimes Saintly Nick's comment before. Maybe in a previous comment (I read your blog, sweetie, and rarely read the comments section).

Sue said...

"Satan loves homosexuals.. And will usually set them up with good careers in something Satan is in control of i.e.. Entertainment.. any form of the Media.."

Deb, I am so sorry people like this exist --

~Deb said...

Anonymous: "DEU 23:17 There shall be no whore of the daughters of Israel, nor a sodomite of the sons of Israel." -------Again, referring to promiscuity. And to me, Leviticus is the old law. Does not apply to Christians any longer.

Leesa: You're welcome. It was interesting! And yes, we are definitely more defined through our actions as opposed to our words.

Sue: Ah, it's what he/she believes - so let him/her live bounded by the 'law' and their 'own interpretations' of the scriptures. Satan hates everyone - and that's a fact.

Anonymous said...

It is important for those of the Christian community to reach out to those who are homosexuals and bisexuals. They need to know that Jesus died on the cross for them just like He did for everyone else. The truth is, homosexuality is not something one is born with, it is a sin, just like adultery, fornication, giving in to lust, and lying. It is important for everyone of us to know this. It is also important for those of the gay and bisexual community to listen. Not everyone who says they are Christian is a Christian; and not every Christian who holds the belief that homosexuality is wrong is not homophobic.

This is not just Old Testament. It is also of the New Testament, or the Covenant of Grace, which we are under. Romans 1:26 says "For this reason God gave them up to vile passions. For even their women exchanged the natural use for what is against nature. Likewise, also the men, leaving the natural use of the woman, burned in their lust for one another, men with men committing what is shameful, and receiving in themselves the penalty of their error which was due."

Homosexuality, not homosexuals, is an abomination to God. God wants us to procreate, and homosexuals cannot procreate. The natural use does not mean that homosexuals are unnatural, but what they are doing is not a part of God's plans. These verses are not inspired by an anti-gay Deity, but by a loving, caring, God who only wants the best for us. These verses certainly are not about in any way, nor implying homophobia or violence against gays, lesbians, and bisexuals. No one is born gay, it is chosen. That is why it is called an "alternative lifestyle", which entails a choice. It is not like being born of a certain race or being male or female. It is not genetic.

Yes, God did create a helper for man, a woman. If this sounds homophobic to you, then you are mistaken. It is not. I understand that homosexuals suffer and are treated badly, and Jesus loves you and understands your pain. Christianity is a religion of love, but it is also a religion about justice and judgement. All of us will stand before God one day and will have to answer for everything we have done in this life. Homosexuality is an abomination to God. It is a sin and the wages of sin is death.

Anonymous said...

AND. yes, there is a difference between homophobic and biblical views on Homosexuality!!
The views of Christian who says that homosexuality is wrong have come under attack. Sadly, for every true believer that loves the Lord and wants for homosexuals and bisexuals to be saved, there is a false Christian who uses the Bible to spread hatred for homosexuals and others who live "alternative lifestyles". Such is the case with Matthew Shepherd. As we all know, Matthew Shepherd is the young man who was killed simply because he was gay. (Though this has lately been disputed.) At his funeral, there were a family of religious people who had signs reading "Matt in Hell", and "God hates f**s". Such ugliness is not what a Christian make. That kind of ugliness and insensitivity is of the devil.

Yes, the Bible does condemn homosexuality. In fact, it is called an abomination. But never has the Bible endorsed such ugly, Satanic behavior as displayed at Matthew Shepherd's funeral. God has never, and never will, once endorse outright homophobia towards homosexuals and bisexuals. We should love the gay, bisexual, and transgendered people because Jesus loves them and died for them.

And yes, it is possible for someone who is gay or bisexual to change!!! This is not homophobia, it is fact. No one is born gay. Homosexuality is not genetic!!! It is a chosen act between men and women of the same sex.

Why can't any of you get this?

The Rev. Dr. Kate said...

Oh, Deb - Good heavens! I have been thinking and praying alot about this issue in response to what is presently going on with the anglican communion regarding the episcopal churches consecration of an openly gay man as a bishop. I see the debate as being one about an incomplete definition of sin. Scripture reinforces the concept of righteousness as justice-making, NOT personal piety. Won't bore you with it here- there's more on my blog if this is something you want to think about.
Let me just say that I live in a state where marriage is for all people and I have blessed several gay unions - one of them that of my own dearly loved brother-in-law and his life-long partner. It is an honor, a delight and a joy to bless any couple who love each other and want to make a life together centered in the love of God. I wish folks could get over their fear and their need to judge others and lets move on to feed the hungry and clothe the naked which we can all agree is a gospel command given to all of us and each of us by Christ Jesus!

QUASAR9 said...

Hi Deb, some people think the way they live is the way everyone should live.

Should we all drink wine -or- beer
Should we all drink coffee -or- tea
Should we all have milk
Should we all eat meat.

For some killing animals and eating meat is more dirty than sex with the same sex.
I guess if no women wanted to have children, and all women preferred women, we could become extinct
But most of all there'd be a lot of frustrated men, and a lot more bestiality going on.

kathi said...

I believe that once we confess Christ as our Lord and Savior, that he was the Son of God and died for us, rising on the 3rd day and is with our Father in Heaven, that we are Christians and saved by grace. Being men, we all sin (though I do believe that we are called to walk in His light and not sin) we all fall short of His perfection because, again, we are yet men. Therefore, He provided us with mercy. Sodom and Gomorrah were not covered by the Blood, and hadn't received the gift of grace and mercy.

Pittchick said...

You know, I generally don't like to say mean things about people I dont know, but anonymous is an idiot!

Garnet said...

Deb- Christianity has been hijacked by a culture with questionable moral intentions in the world. Power and manipulation are the primary goals, shrowded in scripture and condescending attitudes. Though I'm not religious, my opinion is that they have no idea that God could be BETTER than they can possibly imagine.

You are courageous. You are an example for the rest of us. Thank you for that.

~Dawn said...

Lovely Deb!
It is wonderful to hear of your continued relationship with your spouse, always inspiring to hear. Sometimes you feel like you are the only one.

I'll be praying for grace to be more understood by Anon.

Grace to you and Madelene

Anonymous said...

The reality of life is that in general, fags are proud of their filthy lives, they try to convince everyone that what they are doing really isn't a sin, and they therefore cannot repent. The Bible teaches (and experience shows) that God has given fags up. In Romans 1, it says that God has given them up to uncleanness, to vile affections, and to a reprobate mind. These perverts who are given up by God are hated by God, they will never have hope, they will continue to live as workers of iniquity, they will never have any interest in repenting (and indeed, they CAN'T repent, because it's impossible to repent of something that you're proud of), they will die in their sins, and they will burn in hell for all eternity. The only way that a person can come to Christ is if the Father draws him (John 6:44). If the only power in the universe that can draw someone to repentance is God, and God has given that person up, then that person has absolutely no hope. In fact, this is true for most of mankind, because Christ taught that most of mankind goes to hell (Matthew 7:13,14), and is therefore not drawn by God; but it is especially true for fags, who are singled out in Romans 1 as the most perverse form of idolatrous sinners.

It is possible, however, for someone who has been involved in a homosexual lifestyle to repent (1 Corinthians 6:9-11), as long as he is not too far gone to be among those given up by God; with God, all things are possible. (See testimony by people who say they were trapped into a homosexual lifestyle). If that person is not given up by God, he is loved by God, he has always had hope, he will realize that he is a depraved human being and pray to God that He will give him repentance, God will give him repentance, he will die in a saved state, and he will go to heaven for all eternity. If God loves and has mercy on someone, God will give that person repentance. This is true for a small remnant of mankind according to the election of grace (Romans 11:5).

Amy said...

People who discriminate and hate in the name of God are sinning and belittling His children.

There are always going to be people who differ from one another. That is how God made us. From homosexuals, different races, ecologists, republicans...whoever, we all have something to learn from, and to teach, to one another.

One lesson that I have learned in this life is that it is important to understand and respect differences among groups.

I'm blessed with a family that has always made it a priority to learn about and appreciate the unique values, history, interests and lives of others.

My parents instilled in me (even though they may not realize it) that the strength of our existence here on earth lies in unity. We must work together, not against one another.

There are so many things that we all have in common. There are so many things we could do together to change the world. Many of the groups that are discriminated against have been trying to convey this messaage for centuries - yet the greater part of society refuses to listen to anything other than what is the mainstream, or what their "leaders" tell them.

This is dangerous...think George Orwell's "1984".

For example, ecologists have been talking about global warming. For DECADES, they have been chastized, criticized, arressted, and in some cases killed for trying to explain the possible fate of the earth. Well guess what...they have been right this whole time. The earth IS dying and it is becoming too late.

This is just one example of a group that has mocked and chastized just like homosexuals, Jews, Mexicans, and any other group that is different from those who are white-bread numbnuts that cannot think for themselves or relate to anyone who is different from them.

Why can't they relate?

Because in many cases, can't means won't.

Lynn said...

Nothing about you is a sin, Deb. Please do not listen to those who would love nothing better than to see our gay and lesbian neighbors rot in the closet of oppression. Some only want this due to fear of a possible confrontation with their own issues. Hatred, intolerance and oppression are NOT attitudes of Christ. Christ sets you free, He does not lock you up.

Seven said...

I am a straight male in bible belt Texas. Raised in a fundamentalist family. I have read the Bible 4 times, the first time as a child. I am a fiscal and judicial conservative. A social and cultural liberal.
Deb, here's the thing about the haters like anonymous. We live in a world of natural good bequeathed by the Creator. No amount of turning the bible inside out will change the plan of natural law and creation. When the anonymous haters of the world turn their judgment on you they are telling you a very important thing, they are telling you they do not like themselves. It really is so much more simple to be alive and loving in this world than we make it. The foremost command of "love your neighbor as you love yourself" is stood on its head by such haters into a perverted prescription of "hate your neighbor as you hate yourself"
Soldier on my little friend and as long as you love yourself Deb, it will give you the power to love your neighbor as richly. Anonymous has a much longer road to walk. He must first learn to love himself.
God's Peace...and happiness to you.

Enemy of the Republic said...

Shame on you, anonymous!

Miss 1999 said...

"The reality of life is that in general, fags are proud of their filthy lives, they try to convince everyone that what they are doing really isn't a sin, and they therefore cannot repent."

I'm about to piss on myself from laughing at this ignorant individual. Anyone who uses the term "fags" has NEVER heard of the word Christainity-- ever. What a troll!

Ignore this poor, pitiful, lost person. I'll pray for them.

Suzer said...

Hi Deb! Let me first say that I have pointed my partner to your blog, as she also suffers with an anxiety disorder. I think it's been very helpful for her to read your words, so I wanted to thank you. :)

I also wanted to weigh in on the gay pride issue. I really love Gay Pride weekend. I'm not so into the over the top stuff you describe, so I don't usually participate in that aspect of it. I have not understood "pride" to be related to an arrogant pride, but rather the aspect of pride that involves self-esteem. GLBT people have been bashed over the head for so long that to reclaim some self-esteem is often a difficult thing. I think the term "Gay Pride" can help some people do that.

There will always be over the top people, even within the hetero community. I've never seen "Girls Gone Wild," but I've heard about it, and it's probably the same type of behavior I don't like to see anyone exhibiting, gay or straight.

But the thing that I really enjoy about Gay Pride is being able to go to the park with my partner and walk hand in hand without anyone staring at us or giving us dirty looks. Sure, there a few conservative "Christians" standing outside the park screaming at us, but as soon as we enter the safety of the park, it is like a different world. We can be ourselves. We can be a couple without doing all the subtle things we often have to do to hide that (we do live in the South, after all). And I've not seen much of the over the top behavior you've described, but I may not have been at the events where that happens, I dunno.

Anyway, I just wanted to point out there are reasons that Gay Pride can be a good thing. I have experienced it to be the one weekend of the year when we don't feel we are in hiding. It is quite a relief, really. Just a different perspective, I guess.

Blessings to you...


Take 2 said...


I am so sad that you face Christians that choose to judge you. Let's face it those people are judging every other Christian. lesbian or not.

I guess all I can say is that God keeps the books. I will be praying for you that as you build your relationship with Jesus that you will hear HIS voice and not the voices of others. We give an account to God not to others.... "judge not lest ye be judged".

You truly are gracious with people blindsiding you.

I am a Christian.... I am a mother of 3 kids, 14, 12 and 9 months. I am a divorcee, I am remarried to a wonderful man. I do love Jesus and I refuse to judge others.(well with God's help.... I am not perfect but I try)

My wonderful Godly grandmother always used to tell me "Dana, God keeps the books." I have never forgotten that ever!!! Nor will I.

I found your site through Spoke and I am thankful I have found it. You sound like an amazing woman.

Blessings to you.... I will be praying for you as you continue your journey.... Your journey is not fully written, God has a big plan for YOUR LIFE.

Dana :-)

Spoke said...

You know how people that cheat on a diet are the ones pointing out other people's eating habits? I think perhaps annony-mouse is struggling with their own sexual identity and has lost focus on their relationship with Jesus.( If such a relationship even exhists) Why do "believers" continue to rant and judge on blog sites? RELATIONSHIP is key in any dialogue. Deb, please sister, stop provoking the weak-in-Christ. Pj and I don't FLASH our tattys to people in church, nor do we drink simply because we are free in Christ to do so, this is what Paul spoke about...the stumbling brother.
As I've said before girl, I don't get it. But it isn't up to me is it?
Those of us in Christ, are seen by God through the filter of Jesus' blood. How can humans even begin to understand THAT miracle?
Annony, Focus on YOUR walk. Do not allow Satan to distract you by other people's stuff!