It's OK Not to Be OK!
Qualifying Your Therapist
How Do You Trust What You Read?
I Was Recently Psychologically Evaluated
"Hi Debra, do you know why we're here?"
I sure did. They asked if I wanted to harm myself or others. I told them I was too much of a coward to do anything. I'd probably pass out before I even did the deed. One of them chuckled. They asked a series of other questions which would determine me fit or unfit to sit in a padded room for 72 hours. Then the head doctor said, "You don't belong here. Your grief and this change of moving to another home is exasperating your anxiety." I was ready to just say, "YES take me!" I was so done with all of this stress that I didn't give a rat's ass if they zombied me out on Lithium and fed me jello. I just wanted some peace! So the prognosis was, that I up my therapy sessions and take more magnesium. On top of that, they wanted to put me on a medication that conflicted with my doctor's opinion, called "Mirtazapine"---which is a medication used to amp up the appetites of anorexia patients. I'm already 'well rounded' and didn't need more weight gain in the process. Then the social worker came in to give me a final evaluation. She asked me to talk about my mom---I guess to see where my level of grief was. I was telling her funny things like, she was so lively and funny, a bit of a drinker, but enjoyed her life with her family. The social worker looked straight into my eyes and said, "You may wanna follow the footsteps of your mom and do what she did in life, wink wink." Then she said, "Go home and have a stiff drink." You can't make this stuff up! It's like the worst thing you can tell somebody who is being psychologically evaluated. But it was funny, nonetheless. And yes I had a glass of wine when I got back home.
Why Are You Sharing All of This On Social Media???
In conclusion, I hope that as time goes on, we can be less afraid to admit to our struggles, and find help and support instead of hiding it at the bottom of a pill or wine bottle. And if you ever need a supportive ear, please message me. I'm a little unconventional about giving out the suicide crisis hotline, because if you're like me, all you want is somebody to HEAR you and that you truly don't want to die, that you just want to LIVE and be yourself again. Some of these psyche wards are like prisons. A cold bed with no sheets (for obvious reasons) and you won't care because they'll be pumping you up with the most sedating of all drugs. But sometimes, that's what some people need---some people---meaning dangerous to themselves or to others. From my psychiatrist's mouth---you'll come out ten times worse than you did going in. Trust me. Find someone to talk to. There's also a mental health mobile unit that will come to your home in a regular car, and just sit and talk with you until your panic attack or suicidal thoughts pass. They're there in cases of a crisis, where you feel like you need to go to the ER. Call the mental health mobile before a suicide hotline. This is my unprofessional advice of being an expert of having gone through this since I was sixteen years old.
- Be good to yourself.
- Forgive yourself.
- Like yourself more---love yourself more.
- Allow yourself to express your feelings.
- Know that you are not alone.
- Reach out.
- Help someone else to get your mind off of yourself.
- Always practice your coping mechanisms.
- Pray without ceasing.
- Conjure up positive thoughts & plans for the day ahead every evening.
- Visualize having the best day ever before going to bed.
And just feel better...
For more of Deb's articles, please visit: www.debrapasquella.com
or join her on Facebook and Twitter. Check out her cooking blog at DebsCucina.com
for some of her famous recipes!