Living Proof

The best thing about blogging are of course the comments left by interesting people putting in their two cents, and of course, the inquisitive emails I get from readers who never comment---or sometimes from the regular people who comment on a daily basis. Emails consist of many people who are in the closet, that want to know more information about my life, and how and when I came 'out'. Some of the emails I get are from women that are married with children, who have known all their lives that they were homosexual. They wanted to live the ‘normal lifestyle’. See, each person is so different. I can’t give advice to anyone—because I live a different life than they do. I would hate to break up a marriage and encourage homosexuality. No. I won’t do that. All I can suggest is that they pray (if they do believe in a God) and meditate upon it. Weigh the pros and cons out. If you’re totally unhappy , then do some self-searching and try to see what your heart really desires. I get emai...

It’s Madelene’s first day back at work since she has been sick with the flu. Last night, I tanked her up with what the doctor ordered---prescription cough medicine with codeine. What a magical potion that is. She didn’t cough all night, she didn’t toss and turn like a grilled sausage, and she didn’t even sneeze! Now, for those who know my Madelene, she can sneeze thirty times in one set. Believe me, it drives me insane. Did you ever hear that saying---that if a phone rings enough times, it can literally drive a person mentally insane? (True fact) Well, the sneezing applies as well. Luckily, I have recovered somewhat, however Madelene will be out of the house and back in the office, while I work at home airing the fricken place out like you wouldn't believe. I woke up extra early just to do my work, and then do some ‘spring cleaning’. I’m going all out. No, it’s not a problem, and I don’t think I need an intervention thank you very much. (hehe) I just feel that cleanliness is ne...

You can’t even imagine what my OCD manias go through while being sick—and having someone else sick besides me. It drives me insane. I secretly have to run to wash every single doorknob, every single thing I touch and wash my hands thoroughly. After washing my hands and drying them off, I head over to the antibacterial gel in my purse and pour a huge glob in the palm of my hand to make sure every single little critter is gone. My mind races like a mental patient rocking back and forth in her little padded room. What if something on the carpet rises up and gets me even sicker? I haven’t washed the floors in a week now—I’m sure something’s brewing. Droplets! Droplets! Droplets in the sink! There must be a whole mess of little germy creatures roaming about---and I can’t even see them. MUST REPLACE TOOTHBRUSH! If I can’t due to being that sick, I grab a cup and fill it up with Listerine, and soak it overnight. That seems to calm me down a tad. Then I have a wiseass come up to me, or even ...

It’s enough to drive you crazy—being sick with the flu. It’s even worse when your partner/girlfriend/boyfriend or marital spouse gets sick with you. For my birthday, Madelene gave me the flu wrapped up in a red ribbon. We were quarantined in our home for quite some time. Between coughing in one another’s face to sneezing in each other’s direction while we were trying to go to bed was just insane. “Can you open a window?” “Are you kidding? I got the chills! No way!” I said. “But I’m burning up and I want my fever to go down.” Madelene whines, as I grudgingly walk over to the window and open it. I then covered myself with three huge comforters to get warm. I couldn’t help it—every time she coughed or sneezed, I cringed. I thought, “I’m gonna get sicker!” But if I already have what she has, then why would that even cross my mind? My OCD drives me complete mad when I’m sick ---especially when someone else is sick around me. When one was feeling better than the other, that person would he...

Whoa is me. Whoa is me. I’m having a pity party. Both Madelene and I have the flu. She’s sicker than I am, so needless to say, I’m taking care of her ‘for now’, but we are both in bad shape. Yesterday she came home early from work. They sent 75% of her office home due to people complaining of flu-like symptoms. As soon as she came home, she was hacking up a lung, sneezing ten million times (which is no different from any other day) and complained of body aches. I took her temperature, and it was 102 degrees. Not even an hour later, I’m coughing up a lung, hacking away, sneezing up a storm and my eyes were all watery. My head felt like a huge waffle. I don’t know if it was sympathy pains or what—but we are both home sick today. The worst part about it, is that Madelene made reservations at my favorite sushi restaurant for my birthday tomorrow, and we were going out dancing afterwards. Instead, we'll be home with piles of tissues and empty bowls of chicken soup laying around. Now,...

Oh who am I kidding? I always tend to think there’s hope to find new and exciting people out there to make friends with; whether it’s going out to the bar mingling, or even online. I’ve met a few people within the last couple of years. I found the friendships I developed were quite complicated and full of surprises. Of course, I have my friends within my circle that I hold dear---but there’s always a tinge of excitement when meeting a new friend for the first time. I’m so evil when it comes to getting to know someone. I sometimes badger them with political views and see where they stand. I delve into some risqué topics, and/or just embarrass them with topics they never thought would be brought to the table. I love the element of surprise. Just seeing the look on their face is priceless. On one of my adventures of the ‘online dating’ fiasco, I encountered one girl who challenged me with intellectual conversation. Yes —I said it--- I’m intellectually challenged ----now shush! She intri...

We all had our little crushes on someone when we were younger. I wonder if ‘puppy love’ can be ‘true love’. How do you know you’re in love---when you’re just a kid? Is it possible for a kid of fourteen years old to be in love? Well, I’m going to tell you about my first heartbreak; my very first crush. I still suffer from it today. It had a huge impact on me ---and it still does. I had this major crush on my neighbor since ----forever------ probably since I was ten years old. She was a goddess! (Still is!) She had bright blonde hair that fell past her shoulders, and beautiful crystal blue eyes. She looked like she was eighteen years old. All the older guys hit on her —not realizing her age. I think everyone had a slight crush on her. She was way too intelligent and too mature-looking for her age. We would wait for the bus together and we would always hang out after school and have sleepovers. Oh get your head out of the gutters people! We were kids! I was still in the closet, and...