Living Proof

Here I am at the same spot, drinking my double espresso latte without the muffin, because I’m not quite hungry. It’s crowded more than usual in the café and my tolerance for people is next to zero. I had to wait to get this tiny little table so I could write about nothing. Some overzealous buffoon on his Bluetooth bumped into me, making me almost lose my balance on the long line ahead of me, hoping his aggressiveness will get him further in line…or maybe further in life. I’m sure he’s single and has been for a very long time. The lady’s perfume in front of me was gagging me half to death and making my asthma kick in overtime. I was ready to hose her down with Poland Spring. I get to my little table and set everything up. The echoes of every wannabe executive in that café on their cell phones were making me nuts. I instantly got ADD. I tried to focus, but all I could manage to do was read the headlines on Yahoo News. My eyes were dry and foggy. I didn’t get a good night’s sleep. I’ve b...

A double espresso latte, one blueberry muffin, my laptop- all sitting on this round little brown lacquered table in a café down the road from me. Various people are walking inside to get relief from the cold air that’s sweeping New York this morning. Some look as though they’re preparing for their big day at the office, and others seem as though their strolling along, possibly unemployed and trying to occupy their time …like me. I have work, but it’s not enough. I have money, but it’s not enough. I’ve convinced myself that anything I have just isn’t enough. I’m grateful, but it’s not enough gratitude. Finally, I’m in the process of moving out of my apartment that sits on top of my parents’ place. I love my parents, however, it’s time to move farther away; farther from where I grew up. I need change. There’s so much happening in my life at this time that it’s hard to say how I feel. I’m excited, because I have this place being prepared for us, a beautiful penthouse apartment with skyl...

There are many people who do not realize that they’re being manipulated. From Coping.org, there’s a perfect description for detecting when and if you’re being manipulated. Here are the signs: Manipulation is a set of behaviors whose goal is to: Get you what you want from others even when the others are not willing initially to give it to you. Make it seem to others that they have come up with an idea or offer of help on their own when in reality you have worked on them to promote this idea or need for help for your own benefit. Dishonestly get people to do or act in a way which they might not have freely chosen on their own. "Con'' people to believe what you want them to believe as true. Get "your way'' in almost every interaction you have with people, places, or things. Present reality the way you want others to see it rather than the way it "really is.'' Hide behind a "mask'' and let people see you in an acceptable way wh...

A very special friend of mine had written me something I needed to read: Looking back, may I be filled with gratitude; Looking forward, may I be filled with hope; Looking upward, may I be aware of strength; Looking inward, may I find peace. ~Author unknown Sometimes, I find myself surrounded by those who wreak havoc on my emotions. Maybe it’s the way I internalize things, events and situations? Maybe it’s the way I process it all? As I try to resolve and find solutions for anything that has gone wrong in my life, my ‘opponents’ seem to dwell and seek further turmoil and drama. I’m not sure why. Are there people who seem to be attracted to complicated situations or drama? If they don’t have the excitement of arguments or conflicts, do they find themselves lost in a world of silence? I always try to understand how the human mind works. I mostly try to understand how my own mind works. Some would say I easily blow off the ‘big things’---the things that need more attention or focus on. Wh...

My theory: we’re all here to constantly learn. Since my belief is, this earth, this world, this place that we know all too well is only temporary until we get into the big pearly gates; we’re just here to constantly learn more and more. I guess I have to accept that God knows the bigger picture. I only see a small scope of things, but it’s frustrating when I don’t know everything. Who does? Uncertainty. What is it? The unknown, the stuff that goes on without your knowledge, the things that are beyond our “control”. Sometimes we get frustrated because we didn’t get the job we wanted, we didn’t achieve a certain goal or we don’t know what’s in store for us in the future. Will I have kids? Will I get that dream job? Will the love of my life come walking in my life anytime soon? We just don’t know. We can’t force fate; we can only draw it in with positive energy. We can’t control things, people or destiny. Life’s unpredictable, like the weather. Who can control the rain? “Can you shout t...

Let me go on a rant about something please... I’d like to think that I’m a very patient person when it comes to customer service representatives, tech support people and other folks who help us out with products or services, however, I have been on the phone now for 2 hours with the same rep trying to understand his thick Indian accent. This is the 4th rep I have been on the line with. Remember when my computer blew out? My Sony Vaio crapped out on me and I sent it off to get it repaired. The phone call for that order was 2 hours long as well. Anyway, right now I am on the phone, listening to this guy process my order- which is taking him even longer than expected. I have never been so frustrated before in my life with customer service. I kindly asked him where I was calling. He said the call center was located in India. I don’t have anything against people from this area, however, for Sony to send us all the way to the Middle East that rubs me the wrong way. Why can’t we get our own ...

What does it mean? Whoever you talk to- a friend, spouse, family member or a co-worker, 95% of the time, they will agree with whatever you have to say regarding a personal matter that’s going on in your life. Some advice may be a little too over the top, and others may be generalized for the sake of staying neutral, but overall, you’ll come to notice that the advice you get from the people closest to you will deter you from making a conscious and wise decisions of your own. Influences. People who are close to us have the influence to persuade us one way or the other. Sometimes, people do it out of self-gratifying reasons. Sometimes, you have to ask yourself, does this person want something out of this? What would he/she gain if I told them this, or got advice from them about that? Does this person have a romantic interest in me? Or is this person jealous of the relationship I have with whomever I’m having the problem with for whatever reason? How do you determine what’s “good advice”?...