Living Proof

Ever since my dad was diagnosed with cancer, he’s been getting radiation treatments from Monday through Friday. They wear him out. He goes in for a few minute at a time and when he comes back home, he sleeps most of the day. His appetite is next to none. He has lost over thirty pounds so far and has completely stopped smoking. He says cigarettes disgust him ...(a prayer I prayed a week before he quit mind you.) I prayed that somehow, some way, he would pick up a cigarette and be entirely disgusted to where he would never pick one up again. Now it’s my mother he’s concerned about. We’re all concerned about her. While dad sits inside the waiting room of the clinic to get radiation, he is considered one of the ‘light cases’ there - while others are worse off, some with tumors on their hearts which are inoperable, and others with throat cancer due to smoking. For the first time in my father’s life, he actually sees what smoking can really do to people. For the first time in my father’s li...

Between a lack of sleep and my thought process brewing from the early evening hours, I found myself awake, eyes wide opened, hoping at any given moment, the sandman would come find me. I tried chamomile tea, reading long painstaking articles and even tried deep breathing, visualization type of stuff. Nothing worked. I feel “change”, and no - not the menopausal type of change, but change in means of how I think and how everything around me and in my life has taken a slight shift. Change is good, but often at times can leave me scared and questioning every single thing in my life. Years ago, if you told me my dad cancer, I’d know without a doubt that he wouldn’t give up. He’s a fighter. I looked up to my dad because he was so strong, brave and nothing ever got him down. ..except for this. Not even a year ago, I couldn’t imagine him giving up. His positive attitude, his energetic spirit and laughter were all ingredients to kick this thing. Now, when I walk into the room where he rests his...