Saturday, October 27, 2007

Accepting Uncertainty

My theory: we’re all here to constantly learn. Since my belief is, this earth, this world, this place that we know all too well is only temporary until we get into the big pearly gates; we’re just here to constantly learn more and more. I guess I have to accept that God knows the bigger picture. I only see a small scope of things, but it’s frustrating when I don’t know everything. Who does?

Uncertainty. What is it? The unknown, the stuff that goes on without your knowledge, the things that are beyond our “control”. Sometimes we get frustrated because we didn’t get the job we wanted, we didn’t achieve a certain goal or we don’t know what’s in store for us in the future. Will I have kids? Will I get that dream job? Will the love of my life come walking in my life anytime soon? We just don’t know. We can’t force fate; we can only draw it in with positive energy. We can’t control things, people or destiny. Life’s unpredictable, like the weather. Who can control the rain?

“Can you shout to the clouds and make it rain? Can you make lightning appear and cause it to strike as you direct it? Who gives intuition and instinct? Who is wise enough to count all the clouds? Who can tilt the water jars of heaven, turning the dry dust to clumps of mud?” ~Job 38:34-38

No. I can’t do any of that. I can’t stop things from happening or make them happen. It’ll only lead to frustration and irritability. The serenity prayer helps me put things in perspective when trying to control every aspect of my life…

“God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference. Living one day at a time;Enjoying one moment at a time; Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace; Taking, as He did, this sinful world as it is, not as I would have it; Trusting that He will make all things right if I surrender to His Will; That I may be reasonably happy in this life and supremely happy with HimForever in the next. Amen.”

I want to live a life full of impassivity and not worry about things that are beyond my control. I’m trying to discover life and not to unleash the negativity that follows behind the desire to increase that false illusion of supremacy that I seem to have. The truth of it is, not one person is able to “control” anything, anyone or any happenings. When people think they have control- they don’t. It’s a form of an attack, whether emotionally or physically. The person, thing or happening that you’re trying to control will naturally be against your will, feeling or being suppressed by an overbearing opponent. You might think you have won, but the truth is, you’ve probably won the battle of keeping things “tight”, however, eventually, that’ll unleash and slip right through your fingers.

Will it matter in the afterlife? Will this certain issue even matter 10 years from now? Trying to play the role God is a hard thing to do. Those are some big shoes to fill! I don’t think I’d want to take on that job, however, I am still in a huge learning process that if things don’t go my way, that learning to accept the things I cannot change will help me not only emotionally, but physically as well.

“When doubt filled my mind, your comfort gave me renewed hope and cheer.” Psalm 94:19

“I have waited patiently for the Lord to help me, and he turned to me and heard my cry.” ~Psalm 40:1