Friday, February 10, 2006

Friday's Madness

Today was a day where there was too much hand shaking going on. Here’s the deal… I went to stop by my sister Carla’s office for a visit. She introduced me to every single person in that building. Each hand shaken, and each time I was frightened. I even got offered to take a sip of someone’s drink that had a cold. Yes, Carla’s friend Scott has taken the initiative to make me feel right at home. The conversation with him was alarming. A forceful cough came after each word.

“Will you stop coughing in my direction please?” I said, as he knows I’m allergic to people who are sick.
“Do you want a sip of this?” He asks.
“No. I don’t want a sip of that.”
“He’s sick Deb!”
Carla informs me of what I already know. Scott loves to test my nerves. He even asked me what OCD was. I didn't have the heart to tell him, but he certainly has a way of tweaking my OCD big time. There was a time we were all hanging out at his house with a few people. He brought a bottle of wine out, and poured it in our glasses. As soon as I wanted another glass--he took a swig out of the bottle and looked my way. I went for a beer after that. He doesn't look like the epitome of health--now does he?

I had to leave and run some errands. I went into town to Radio Shack. Carla wanted to come along. I had to return a phone that didn’t work. Anyway, as I was finishing up getting my refund, I noticed Carla roaming around the store.

“Ready?” I asked.
“Yeah, let’s go.”

She went first and headed for the door. The alarm sounds. She got startled and kept backing up, and then going through the security filters. Again, it sounded.

“Excuse me miss, can you come with me?” The manager yelled out, all authoritative.
“I didn’t steal anything from your store! It’s my Nextel—it always interferes with electronic equipment!” She said, in an angry tone.
“Well, we have to check your purse as a regular procedure.”
“Fine! Check it!”
She said, in a tone that said a thousand words.

Nothing was in her purse. She flew out of there faster than anything.

“Fcuking people—I can’t believe he checked my purse! I was going to tell him that I wasn’t planning to steal anything from your sh*tty store anyway.”
“I just can’t take you anywhere Carla! Will you quit your shoplifting addiction?”

I dropped her off and headed off to do the rest of my errands. I stopped by at the local drug store which is a huge chain. Now, the people who work here are like straight from hillbilly heaven.

“Karen, can you please come to the front? Karen---please come to the front.” I hear from the loud speakers.
“Alright! Alright! I can’t do anything around here without y’all screaming for me. God damn it, I was counting the stock! Now I lost where I was at!” The lady yelled from the back of the store.
“Karen, can you please come to the back? Karen---please come to the back.”
“Now y’all fcuking with me! I can’t be at two places at once! Will y’all make up your mind?”
She yells across the huge store.

There’s a snow storm heading over tomorrow evening. I had to go to the grocery store to pick a few things up. It’s like everybody and their fricken mother was doing the same exact thing. Believe me—we’re not going to get twenty feet of snow people! We live in New York---they invested in big trucks and plows. No need to grab every loaf of bread on the shelf and tons of bottled water. I felt like there was a catastrophe about to happen. People go nuts right before a storm. Never, ever, walk into a grocery store unless you watch the weather on the news. That’s how I predict if it’s going to be crowded or not.

Tonight should be interesting. Madelene and I are venturing out. We made reservations at a really nice restaurant. She can’t drink anything because she’s still on antibiotics. She is all better—thank God. Occasionally she’ll still cough like a mule in heat, but it’s no longer contagious.

If you want to get a few good laughs, please head over to Mikey’s place for a great overview of our virtual wedding.

Have a great weekend!
(This is where the term 'fraggle' came from. Jis' sayin...) I know, I know...take your meds Deb!