Saturday, February 25, 2006

America's Most Wanted

Please be on alert for our very own blogger, Mike. Investigators on ABC News and CNN reported last night of Mike’s arrest for attempted robbery and indecent exposure. He was first seen by Walmart’s cameras sifting through women’s lingerie and apparel. He has been growing his hair into a mullet and has been seen wearing make up on occasion. Mike has escaped from prison and is now headed towards the northeast—particularly in the New York area. He is armed and dangerous! Do not attempt to approach him.

Rumor has it that Mike is trying to do whatever it takes to make his marriage work, so he is trying to appear more like a woman. He refuses to shave his mustache, but is willing to do what is necessary in order to keep Deb happy. Some say he has already started hormone therapy. Changing his sex may be a possibility. He has already booked a trip to Thailand. This may be the reason why his behavior is erratic and unruly.

If you see Mike, please report this to your local police department or call our confidential hotline 1-800-CRIME-TU…(Transvestite Unit)

Your tip might provide valuable insight and investigators may want to ask you for more information. Additionally, some cases provide rewards for information leading to capture or recovery. In this case, there is no reward. Personal information will be treated with the utmost security and privacy.