Tuesday, November 15, 2005

Just a Bad Bad Morning...


This isn’t good. The day has to get better. I’m not off to a good start. Madelene wakes up, and starts getting ready before I do. She always turns on the TV in our bedroom to see the weather forecast, even though she saw it on the ten o’clock news the night before.

Fine.

Anytime she touches this TV we have, something goes wrong. We recently purchased two TVs, one in the bedroom which is a liquid flat screen TV, and one TV in the living room- which is a 48 inch flat screen plasma. These TVs do not make any sound when you turn them on or off. Just ~poof~, and it’s off. They’re very silent that way—even while changing channels.

For some odd reason, when Madelene touches these TVs, something goes wacky. This morning, the sound went off. I tried fiddling with the options, and nothing. I tried turning it on, then off, then back on—and nothing. I finally waited five minutes, turned it back on again, and voila---there it was---sound and all!

Madelene leaves, and then I head into the bathroom to get ready. The toilet doesn’t want to flush. Did she notice that there was a problem? Or did she leave this for her girlfriend 'the plumber' to fix? Okay, fine. I go in there like a trooper and fix the little sinky-dingy that makes it flush—(oh shush, I am not technical with plumber’s terms)… Toilets are more complicated than one can imagine...Problem solved…for now.

Ah...Time for coffee! I need a little pick-me-up this morning, because I’m still feeling tired. I decided to make myself a cappuccino. My cappuccino is more like black espresso. No milk, no sugar—no nuttin’… Just your pure strongest cup of coffee ever. As I’m making my delicious cup of java, I notice that the coffee is struggling to pour out. I start to wiggle the nozzle a little, to loosen up the coffee grind holder. The machine starts spraying out piping hot coffee all over the place, and all over me! Not only was I scorched, but the entire kitchen was showered down with brown puddles of coffee everywhere.

I start playing Cinderella, and begin wiping the floors on my hands and knees. After cleaning every drop that was left, I grab my coffee, and head back to my office to work. This should be it. No more problems. I was all set and ready to start the day. Nothing could go wrong at this point…naw…

I had to get some papers from the other room to bring into the office. My desk has been a little cluttered lately, which gives me anxiety, so occasionally I will overflow my work into the other room. As I make my way into the office, holding my hot cup of espresso and a pile of papers, I slip and fall, and the coffee goes everywhere. Let me tell you how delicious my house smells this morning. It’s like walking into Starbuck’s. Papers everywhere with little brown drops of java, and coffee spilled throughout the wooden floors, I managed to pick up my mug that was amazingly still in tact, and head over to my desk. I think someone is trying to tell me to do a little spring cleaning around here. I’m just hoping that nothing goes wrong at my chiropractor’s office later today. I pray that he isn't experiencing the same problem I am.

I feel like I have no control over myself. Everything I touch, falls, and I can’t even balance myself on my own two feet. No, I have not been drinking. Someone once told me this interesting little ‘theory’—if you will…Please excuse me if I don’t use the correct terminology for those who study these things…But I was once told that something in the atmosphere makes us more clumsy and unbalanced at certain times of the year. I’ve heard the term ‘mercury’ used several times to account for these incidents. I’ve heard it used more so when someone fumbles with their words. They say everything backwards.

What is it that makes us clumsier than other days? I’m pretty careful when it comes to that kind of stuff. Madelene, on the other hand, bumps into walls, falls over her own feet, and knocks herself into everything she comes across…that’s just ‘her nature’…She sometimes comes home with more than a few bruises.

Can anyone explain this to me?